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i hate myself

justarando
Community Member

i genuinely hate myself. there is not one thing i like about the way i look, what i can do or my personality. i do musical theatre, which a few years ago was something i thought would be great for confidence and since i loved singing, but it made me realise how bad i am. i cant stop comparing myself to my friends and just constantly feel worthless. when the topic of self love starts up i just want to cry because ive tried so hard to change but i cant love myself for who i am. musical theatre and singing was something i was once interested in but now hate doing but i cant quit because without it ill have no friends. plus, ive always had a difficult time making friends so ive already gone to a psychologist about it and moved schools within the past few months. i just dont know what to do but if i show any sign of doubting myself, people think im attention seeking when i cant help it. i practically now use it as sarcastic humour to hide my true feelings and how i just want to breakdown. why am i not good enough? why couldnt i have been anyone else? i just constantly feel useless, irrelevant and ugly

55 Replies 55

Thanks for understanding (about my lack of confidence) justarando. That was very thoughtful of you

You are always more than welcome to talk about whats on your mind and let your thoughts flow to us..anytime

When time allows I really hope you can let us know how your current show went that you have 12 hours of rehearsal for..I wont wish you 'luck' just my admiration and respect

please be gentle to yourself

Paul

thank you paul

Hi J

I hope you are doing ok as I saw you post just a few minutes ago, I just wanted to stop in and say I was thinking of you and in response to your point of "are they just saying what I want to hear, do they genuinely mean it", well I can't speak for everyone but I can speak for me, I am here as a person who does not get paid by BB, who doesn't even have a Mental Health qualification, just a "rando" who cares, who has been hit with the trauma of suicide and now feels that I have a place in the world to listen, to share what I can and to make 1 person feel and know they are worth it, that in their darkest moment I can say "I care".

I hope to chat to you some more J

Hope your study is going well and you can get some sleep tonight.

AS

hi AS,

thank you so much for constantly replying to not only me, but to everyone you can. its great that BB has someone like you, especially since you also give great advice. it is really appreciated by everyone on this website.

J

Hi J

Thank you so much for that lovely message and I do reply alot as I do care, if I can stop one family from having to go through what we went through on that day and continue to go through then I can feel peace. I am only too hapy to chat and to help and just provide some comfort really, the comfort that my brother never reached out for, but you have, and now I can give to you what I could not to him.

I hope your day is going well and that you have done something to make you smile.

I would love to hear that one day you have looked in the mirror, if only for 10 seconds and found something beautiful to love....imagine that....or put your hand on your chest and felt your warm and caring heart...and know you are wonderful.

Chat soon J

Sarah

hi sarah,

i am so so sorry about your brother. thank you for everything though,

Julia

Thank you Julia and it is so wonderful to call you by your beautiful name.

You have taught me way more than you know so I should be thanking you...

I have a 13yo daughter and times are tricky as you well know being a teen, so talking to the young adults of the world is so insightful and wonderful for me to learn what goes on and the pain that you go through, sometimes with a smile on your face.

Thank you for your kind words about my brother, however if there is even one tiny bit of hope out of a shitty situation is that I am here and talking to people like you.

Sarah 🙂

Hey Julia

Just wanting to stop in and see how you are doing today.

I have been thinking of you and hope you have something today that has made you smile.

Hugs

Sarah

Hello Julia

Just thinking of you and hoping you are good, the fact you are not on here makes me think so which is awesome.

Take care

Sarah

hi sarah,

genuinely forgot about my thread but like yea i dont know if ive felt any better. thanks for your interest though