I dont know how people do this.

[Illyana_333]

I'm in year 10 of high school and honestly don't know how I'm gonna keep doing this for the rest of my life. Getting out of bed every day just to go to school where i get constantly bullied and always feel judged is killing me and I've got so much going on i cant be happy for anything. My dad despises me, my mum is so stressed with work that she yells for no reason, my dog is dying soon etc etc. (For added juicy context, i have diagnosed anxiety so that's fun) My dad also wants me to get a part time job on top of allat but hell no. I honestly feel like i need to be placed in a psych ward because i literally have no way of coping for this. And i cant even talk to my parents because my mum is so busy and my dad doesn't believe in anxiety or depression or anything like that. Maybe its my medication,  but everything just feels so dull and i don't know how I'm gonna survive like this. All i want to do is go back to bed and never wake up tbh

[indigo22]

Hi Illyana_333,

Welcome and thank you for reaching out to us.

I am sorry to hear that you are going through such a challenging time and don't feel supported by your parents.

I went through something similar at your age and I understand how alone and lost you feel. I also understand the thought of wanting to go to sleep and never wake up. This is not how a young person should be feeling, it's not the way life is meant to be. Unfortunately, some of us have challenges that others don't and it can be so hard to figure all that out when you have so little life experience. Because we don't know how to handle it, we can begin to spiral and at that point it is time to reach out for help. I am so proud of you for doing that today.

We will be here for you whenever you want to talk, but I also want to give you another resource to reach out to and talk to someone in real time. You don't have to deal with this alone anymore, there are people who know what you are feeling and want to help. Please put the number below into your phone so you can use it whenever you need to. They also have an online live chat service if you prefer to do that.

Kids Helpline - available 24/7 - 1800 55 1800

https://kidshelpline.com.au/get-help/webchat-counselling

Please continue reaching out, you are important and deserve to be heard.

Thinking of you with care,

indigo 💜

[therising]

Hi Illyana_333

You have so much going on in your life right now and I feel for you so much. I think one of the toughest things to do in life is live it easily when you just don't know how to. I find sometimes guides are an absolute must (people who are going to lead the way), providing a number of different paths to consider. Indigo's offered some paths well worth considering.

When our kids get older and appear to be more self sufficient, there are times where we parents forget they still need solid guidance and support at times. While your dad doesn't sound like a go to person for mental and emotional support, I'm wondering if you could approach your mum when it comes to guidance. If she was to say 'I can't cope with this right now, as I have so much going on at work', it may pay to suggest 'I need you to find me someone who can support me as I'm really struggling to cope with a number of things, including daily mental and emotional abuse from people at school'. If you want to push yourself to be completely honest with her, you could add 'At the moment I just feel like I want to go to bed and never wake up'. For a parent, such a statement is a major red alert and requires immediate attention. Some parents, myself included, need a wake up call occasionally. I'd much prefer my kids be honest in expressing their serious struggles, rather than keep that to themself while trying to cope.

People who don't believe in depression, anxiety or other mental health conditions...hmmm🤔😠. They're typically the same people who say stuff along the lines of 'You just need to get on with life', 'You need to get over it (the things your facing)', 'You're too sensitive, you need to toughen up', 'We all had to go through this type of thing' and all that kind of stuff. If you're sensitive enough, you'll be able to sense or feel the dismissiveness in such comments, sense or feel the lack of compassion, the ignorance (while they choose to ignore), the disappointment as they dis-appoint themself from being the guide and support they need to be for someone.

As you face mentally and emotionally disturbing people and factors outside of school, for the people inside of school you could say 'These people are mentally and emotionally disturbing people yet they consider me to be the one with the problem'. If such people were more open minded, more thoughtful, more emotionally mature, more feeling etc, those around them would be free to be happy. For a sensitive person who can easily sense, what can you sense about insensitive people? Based on my own experience, I'd say sometimes I can sense them being anxiety inducing, depressing, enraging, disappointing and the list goes on. Keep in mind, it's not our 'fault' we can feel such things, it points to our ability. How to sense or feel in constructive ways becomes the ultimate goal for someone who has the ability to sense so much so easily. 🙂❤️