Feeling really low

[Brooke110]

Hey guys, so two days ago i went clubbing for the first time, and i got really drunk for the first time as well. I made out with someone kind of weird and spent most of the night dancing with him, and ever since i woke up yesterday, ive been feeling really low, like a mix of guilt, sadness, shame, loneliness...i just feel really gross and wish i never made out or even danced with this guy. I know it might not seem to be a big deal to some, but these feelings wont leave, i was wondering if anyone’s had similar experiences?

Thanks

[Jessicatherese94]

Hi Brooke, yes I've definitely had similar experiences. I do not know a single person who hasn't had an experience like this (women especially feel this way because there is a lot of guilt and shame in being a sexual being as a woman). Countless times I have drunk too much and made out with or been intimate with someone and then regretted it a lot so you are definitely not alone. I would look at this in a positive light - that you now know that making out with a guy drunk isn't your thing. You don't have to do it again! And you know that it's not your thing and that you don't like it. You making out with this guy does not make you a bad person, it actually says nothing about you as a person. Often when people drink they become a completely different person (alcohol after all is a drug) and it actually makes you more likely to engage in behaviour you wouldn't normally. Please don't blame yourself, take it as a learning experience and now you know how that makes you feel, you can avoid doing it. Be kind to yourself. I promise it doesn't make you a bad person and you have absolutely nothing to be ashamed of - almost everyone has been in the same situation. Sending you love x

[Birdy77]

Hi Brooke,

Listen to Jess's lovely advice and please please please go easy on yourself. I know the exact feeling you are going through, and it feels awful i know, but hey, you drank too much and made a few choices you wouldn't normally, but yeah, treat it as a learning experience.

Be kind to yourself. I also would be struggling to think of anybody i know who hasn't had a similar experience to what you've described.

I'm not saying it's not a big deal, because i know the feelings you're describing. But you are not a bad person. Sounds to me like you have high standards for yourself, which is a good thing, and you have disappointed yourself ... it would be worse if you didn't feel like this and just felt fine and kept doing the same behaviour.

Go gently with yourself Brooke 🌻🌻❤ sending hugs. Birdy

[Brooke110]

Thank you so much for your reply! Sorry i didn’t reply sooner, but i really appreciate what you had to say 🙂 It sounds bad, but I’m glad it’s more common than i thought.

Anyway, thanks again for the message

[Brooke110]

Thanks so much for the reply. Honestly appreciate so much!

You’re right - it would be worse if I felt fine about it. I didn’t think of that. Hope you have a really great Christmas 🙂

[Jessicatherese94]

Hi Brooke, glad I helped. Have you been feeling a bit better over the last few days?

[Brooke110]

Hi, I’m so sorry for such a late reply! Yeah, I’m ok now, thanks for asking ❤️ Really appreciate it, hope you’re doing ok 🙂