Young people

Haven't been in a relationship for 7 years

replies: 10

Hey, 24 yrs male with depression. - Semi-popular, introverted in high school with close friends and many acquaintances. - First girlfriend age 16. Broke up after 6 months together. - Rejected by twice, one when I was 15, the other at 17. - After the ... View more

Hey, 24 yrs male with depression. - Semi-popular, introverted in high school with close friends and many acquaintances. - First girlfriend age 16. Broke up after 6 months together. - Rejected by twice, one when I was 15, the other at 17. - After the second one, I stopped pursuing romantic relationships and focussed on studies. - Lost my virginity in a one night stand at schoolies - Went to university, studying two different degrees at two different universities (dropped out of the first one after two years). - I had a couple of close male friends in my first year of university who I met at college (we still keep in touch online). After transferring to my new university, I had no success in meeting new people or establishing friendships. - I haven't been intimate with anyone since that one night stand when I was 18. I'm at a point in my life where I can't see any way out of my current situation. I feel like I made an effort to meet people at university: going to gym/yoga classes, working as a tutor, trying to make friends at uni, volunteering. But I just didn't have much success at all. The fact that I haven't experienced intimacy with anyone for the past 7 years is the primary source of my suffering. Sometimes I can go for months without thinking about it, if I'm distracted enough by work or study. But whenever I'm reminded of it, I just fall into this depressed state that becomes more difficult to overcome each time. One of the biggest triggers for this is whenever I meet a girl that I'm attracted to (which happens every now and then). I'm so ashamed of my inexperience with women. It makes me feel so shit whenever I think about it, just knowing that so many people my age have had the opportunity to enjoy this aspect of their lives. It's something that makes me so insecure around women, which makes it difficult for me to be intimate and open myself up. Despite my lack of a sex life, I do obtain fulfilment from a lot of other areas in life: music, writing, reading, nature. But as of late, it's been really difficult to enjoy these as I'm so preoccupied with the idea of finding a partner. It would be interesting to get some thoughts on how I might be able to improve my situation. Or even if there was anyone out there who can relate to it, just so I don't feel so alone. If anyone's been through this and overcome it, how did you do it? Thanks.

Why Judge Me?

replies: 2

I'm part of a group of friends that I think don't like me and judge me, they sometimes avoid me and I think they are talking behind my back. With recently starting high school, I'm struggling to find my place in the school where I belong. I'm startin... View more

I'm part of a group of friends that I think don't like me and judge me, they sometimes avoid me and I think they are talking behind my back. With recently starting high school, I'm struggling to find my place in the school where I belong. I'm starting to get real tired of it because I thought I had a really good friend before she went behind my back, it's hard to know when the right people come along. I also think the friends I have recently made, talk behind my back and when I try to do stuff with them, they either walk away sometimes or pretend I'm not there. I'm slowly starting to realise that I have to put in effort to make new friends and build a stronger relationship but I want them to do that to. I feel like they just put up with me and I'm not forcing them to do anything. I'm going to start some out of school activities to try and make new friends because then I will feel and see the effort I'm going to put in and I think more people will start to like me when I do it and hopefully I will see results. I don't want to put to much effort in because I know life isn't about being popular but being who you truly are and don't let peoples judgement change that. Many times I have found out that I wasn't included in activities with my friend group and just makes me feel down and question whether I'm good enough or not. But I think that if I find the right people to connect with life will be better and I will form stronger relationships with my family and newly made friends. I just think that if I put in the effort and people out there put in the effort then we could connect more easily and things will slowly start to get better if I just put the effort in and try.

Anxiety an stress about being cheated on

replies: 3

Iv been in a relationship now for about 6 months an over the six months iv found my self every minute of every day thinking that she’s doing something that’s gonna hurt me, it cripples me every day anxiety, I sometimes am convinced she has cheated on... View more

Iv been in a relationship now for about 6 months an over the six months iv found my self every minute of every day thinking that she’s doing something that’s gonna hurt me, it cripples me every day anxiety, I sometimes am convinced she has cheated on me an certain but have no prof or anything I can’t live like this I don’t think I can take another heart break because I no it’ll be fatal for me literally help me

My dad refuses to help me on my way to get antidepressants, and thinks I'm just "chasing pills"

replies: 3

The GP that I go to that can supply help and medication is impossible to get to without my dad driving me there, because I would otherwise have to travel on public transport with my emotionally-abusive mother, and I'm definitely not mentally strong e... View more

The GP that I go to that can supply help and medication is impossible to get to without my dad driving me there, because I would otherwise have to travel on public transport with my emotionally-abusive mother, and I'm definitely not mentally strong enough to handle that right now. I messaged my dad about a month ago and asked if he could help me get to a conveniently-available appointment time that was a day or two after all this happened. He refused to help, and believe that I'm just "chasing pills" and "I don't really want help". I just want to get better, but he refuses to help me with this unless I want to get better in a way he sees fit. I really need help on how to talk to him and how to deal with this, because it's really been mentally damaging me ever since that conversation happened

I want to be my old happy self again

replies: 4

It’s never been this bad. The past two months that is. So I’ve talked to one friend, and she’s been really considerate and helpful. I haven’t told anyone how I felt about everything except her. We spent one afternoon for me to explain myself, and I c... View more

It’s never been this bad. The past two months that is. So I’ve talked to one friend, and she’s been really considerate and helpful. I haven’t told anyone how I felt about everything except her. We spent one afternoon for me to explain myself, and I couldn’t do it, not well enough for her to understand. After that day, I’ve been keeping everything to myself again. I’m 16, and I’ve just moved to a new school this year. I’ve been feeling detached, and just not how I normally am. I normally am up for everything, encouraging and I’m a good listener. These months I’ve never felt so lost and clueless. It’s like I can’t find the right path to travel in. I don’t speak my feelings outright and just let my friends talk about their life. But I don’t remember anything anymore. I really enjoy reading, but sometimes it is beginning to become difficult to concentrate. I feel like I can’t move and have no motivation to do so. I can’t rely on that one friend all the time, because she too has her own problems. And I don’t want to burden my other friends with this sort of sadness I feel constantly. I don’t know how to tell my mother. There are times where she talks to me and I boil up inside. I don’t know what’s wrong, and I can’t shake it away. I just want to be my happy go lucky self again.

Social Isolation, University Worries, mental state gradually getting worse

replies: 3

Hey everyone. I'm a 20 year old male university student. I figured I needed to get this out somewhere. Since beginning university a couple of years ago, I've gradually become more and more socially isolated, and my mental state has been getting worse... View more

Hey everyone. I'm a 20 year old male university student. I figured I needed to get this out somewhere. Since beginning university a couple of years ago, I've gradually become more and more socially isolated, and my mental state has been getting worse. I wasn't hugely popular back in high school, but I had a good circle of 5 close friends, and was friends with a lot of other people as well. As time has gone on in university, I've drifted away from all of them. Right now I only keep in regular contact with one friend, who moved away to another state at the beginning of this year. It's been several months since I've had a face to face conversation with a friend. I feel awkward about trying to message any of my previous friends. They haven't made any effort to reach out to me, and I know they're all still in contact with each other. I don't want to force my way in if I'm not wanted, and I'm not sure I could cope if I they ended up rejecting me. I haven't made any new friends in my time at university as well. I've never been a socially confident person, and having not made any friends in several years has reinforced the negative thoughts I have about my own social ability. I've never had the confidence to meet new people because of fear of rejection. I don't want to feel like I'm imposing myself where I'm not wanted. I'm well aware that I'm isolating myself in order to prevent any negative experiences. I want to change this but I don't know how. The last 2 years have really taken a toll on my mental health. Along with the isolation, I've struggled with anxiety surrounding university. I've struggled to keep up with the work, at times skipping classes out of embarrassment of being behind on projects. I've become pretty depressed as well. My social situation, the ongoing struggles at uni and the feeling that I don't have a positive impact on anyone's life have caused me to have a very low sense of self-worth. I really don't like myself right now, and it has a significant impact on my motivation and energy. I figure seeing a therapist would probably be the best way to start fighting against these issues, but that's a step I'm not comfortable with taking, because I'm not comfortable with my family knowing about these issues. I feel uncomfortable and pressured around them as it is. Having them know that I'm anxious and depressed would just make me feel more uncomfortable around them. If you've read this, thanks. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Anti-depressants, Depression and Apprehensiveness

replies: 2

Hi guys, So I've recently started taking antidepressants - my psychologist says my behaviour shows that I'm dealing with major depressive disorder and anxiety mostly. Tbh, I'm in a lot of denial about the fact of labelling myself as someone who is de... View more

Hi guys, So I've recently started taking antidepressants - my psychologist says my behaviour shows that I'm dealing with major depressive disorder and anxiety mostly. Tbh, I'm in a lot of denial about the fact of labelling myself as someone who is depressed - I think mostly because I feel a lot of pressure from family to "be okay". For example, this whole year, I've felt the need to keep pushing forward with meaningless jobs, even though I have no idea where I'm going since graduating uni earlier this year. Even when I finally told my mum about taking meds yesterday - the first thing she said "be careful not to get addicted". I know she means well - but I can never show a sense of weakness at home - let alone open up to say I'm broken and hurt. Its unfortunate, but thats just how my home is. I want better for myself and my future - but being in this slump as been undeniably hard. Ive tried to do it the natural way - positive self talk, exercise etc but the effect never last long. I just hope I'm not giving in by taking a pill to help fix my problem (< I know that's stupid to say..antidepressants aren't sign of weakness) - but in my small little world I feel like I'm being weak due to continuous anxiety I have of other people's perception of me. I guess I'm just having trouble coming to terms with stigma and dealing with the fact that things have happened to me which have led me to this state of mind. Has anyone else felt the same way?

Need advice for Year 12 formal

replies: 4

Hi all, just a quick question or topic of discussion. So my Year 12 formal is this year and I really don't want to go and it's causing me a lot of worries and anxiety I know the decision is mine and everything but I'm just asking for opinions Would y... View more

Hi all, just a quick question or topic of discussion. So my Year 12 formal is this year and I really don't want to go and it's causing me a lot of worries and anxiety I know the decision is mine and everything but I'm just asking for opinions Would you consider the Year 12 formal important? I don't want to go, but is it wrong to not want to go? Just a question

Depression from emotional abuse

replies: 5

I really need some advice. First time poster. I have been with my bf for around 14 months. The start of the relationship was great until i found he was on dating sites and msging 4 other girls with explicit content for the first 3 months of the relat... View more

I really need some advice. First time poster. I have been with my bf for around 14 months. The start of the relationship was great until i found he was on dating sites and msging 4 other girls with explicit content for the first 3 months of the relationship. Despite this we eventually worked things out and has been faithful ever since. I still find it hard to trust him. My biggest problem now is emotional abuse. Around 4 months ago he quit his job. I have been supporting him since even though i work and study at uni whilst raising a toddler from a previous relatioship. Me and the bf do not live together. He still lives with his parents or stays at mates houses. Lately he has become so far in debt and is on the brink of losing his car. Instead of finding another job he is trying to make quick money and has now taken up smoking weed with his friend that he sees all the time. I have tried to sympathise that things aren't good right now. Ive tried being there. He often goes days without proper contact and i rarely get to see him. I never truely know what he is doing and alot of his stories are really hard to believe. Ive been questioning him about where he is and what he is doing. He makes promises and doesnt commit to them. Lately we argue non stop because i feel so disconnected with him. He will resort to name calling and telling me im mentally fucked because i cant understand he is trying to sort his life and there are more important things then me in his life. Im so anxious and upset all the time because of him. I dont know what to do! He is supposed to be coming over tonight to talk about our relationship. I dont know what direction to take. I feel all these emotions because of him. He makes me feel so alone and will reduce me to tears nearly everyday. I feel like i need to let him go because i dont want to be with someone like that. We had such a deep understanding and now thats lost. Im still here because im so negelect and im waiting that same connection we had. I dont know what to do. I dont want to be cruel. I just want to be appriciated. Ive done so much for him and he is never there for me when i need it. Please someone just give me some strength anc advice so i can move on. Its so hard for me for some reason and i feel really sick to my stomach.

Coming to terms with anxiety and OCD

replies: 12

Hello everyone! I am 13 years old and this is my first ever post on a forum. I have anxiety and OCD, and although it is undiagnosed, I have done some research and as soon as I came across the symptoms of OCD, I immediately connected. I am a bit nervo... View more

Hello everyone! I am 13 years old and this is my first ever post on a forum. I have anxiety and OCD, and although it is undiagnosed, I have done some research and as soon as I came across the symptoms of OCD, I immediately connected. I am a bit nervous posting to a forum, but I'm really hoping to be able to talk to others in my situation and maybe get some support. As I look back, I can see that I have had anxiety and OCD since early childhood. I would often get told that I mothered my older brother too much, and I was constantly panicking over the possibility of a natural disaster occurring. It has really only been this year that I have really known that I had a mental illness, as it has been getting a lot worse. I had never really thought that I had OCD because the stereotypical stance on the condition is that people affected by it must always have things neat and tidy, which isn't me. Recently through some research, I discovered that there are several different types of OCD. I was extremely scared when I found out. I felt insane and alone. Most mental illnesses that I knew of people having were anxiety or depression, or even PTSD. But OCD I'd never really thought of along with those conditions. My mum is aware of my anxiety and has scheduled an appointment with a GP, but that isn't for another month, which scares me what will happen between now and then. I have also tried some online self-help programs, which have helped slightly, but I know that I need professional help. I'm wondering whether anyone else might have OCD or be in a similar situation, or maybe if anyone has any advice for me. I'm sorry that this post is a bit of a mess, but as I said this is my first ever forum post. I hope that maybe I can help others, or others can help me here, and that this can be a safe space for people to discuss their thoughts and feelings - Cerise547

Pinned discussions

New to this Forum? Please read this first!

replies: 0

All discussions

Haven't been in a relationship for 7 years

replies: 10

Why Judge Me?

replies: 2

Anxiety an stress about being cheated on

replies: 3

My dad refuses to help me on my way to get antidepressants, and thinks I'm just "chasing pills"

replies: 3

I want to be my old happy self again

replies: 4

Social Isolation, University Worries, mental state gradually getting worse

replies: 3

Anti-depressants, Depression and Apprehensiveness

replies: 2

Need advice for Year 12 formal

replies: 4

Depression from emotional abuse

replies: 5

Coming to terms with anxiety and OCD

replies: 12

Young people

New to this Forum? Please read this first! replies: 0

Haven't been in a relationship for 7 years replies: 10

Why Judge Me? replies: 2

Anxiety an stress about being cheated on replies: 3

My dad refuses to help me on my way to get antidepressants, and thinks I'm just "chasing pills" replies: 3

I want to be my old happy self again replies: 4

Social Isolation, University Worries, mental state gradually getting worse replies: 3

Anti-depressants, Depression and Apprehensiveness replies: 2

Need advice for Year 12 formal replies: 4

Depression from emotional abuse replies: 5

Coming to terms with anxiety and OCD replies: 12

New to this Forum? Please read this first!

replies: 0

Haven't been in a relationship for 7 years

replies: 10

Why Judge Me?

replies: 2

Anxiety an stress about being cheated on

replies: 3

My dad refuses to help me on my way to get antidepressants, and thinks I'm just "chasing pills"

replies: 3

I want to be my old happy self again

replies: 4

Social Isolation, University Worries, mental state gradually getting worse

replies: 3

Anti-depressants, Depression and Apprehensiveness

replies: 2

Need advice for Year 12 formal

replies: 4

Depression from emotional abuse

replies: 5

Coming to terms with anxiety and OCD

replies: 12