Wife left

[Gato46]

Resided in China for 20 years, married a Chinese women  some 7 years ago ,(wife is 35 and myself 77 now) returned to Australia 4 years ago and with child and wife, she is very unhappy, myself not perfect some lies were told   but I am to blame on all most everything, she suffers depression blame me for it  but won’t seek help. Left home some 3 weeks ago and said she needs time to evaluate our relationship and she wants to come back in two months. For the las 4 year no sex and the level of personal insults toward child and me and swearing is staggering. She said sorry for being a monster but her excuse ‘I am angry’. Twice had to call the police got crazy  and wanted to commit suicide and taken to hospital , she convinced the doctors nothing wrong with her, they let he go back home. Despite everything , I still ,call me stupid, I have some felling’s for the  women just very worried to let her back home without her seeking mental help , I have a child and she doesn’t want mom to come back home. Advise please

Respectfully

Gato46        

[Sophie_M]

Hi Gato46,

Welcome to the Forums! We are so glad that you have found us here. It has been a really tough time for both you and your wife and it is great that you are reaching out for support.

It sounds like you have done the right thing by escalating to emergency services when you are concerned for her welfare. Your local CATT (crisis assessment and treatment team) is another good option here too (although you may have already encountered them considering the recent hospital trip). You can find the number for your area's CATT here. If you’re ever at all concerned about how your partner’s behaviour is affecting you, you can reach out to 1800 Respect on 1800 737 732. They’re kind, understanding and non-judgmental, and can talk things through with you any time, either on the phone or in their online chat.   We hope that the community can be a source of support during this challenging time. Please feel free to let us know how you are going at any time. Kind regards,  Sophie M 

 

[randomxx]

Hi op and v sorry about the situation.

First thing wondering was she always like this or only since you moved back to Aust ? 2nd thing l guess with the age gap it's probably ran it's course especially if she hates it here on top of it but your child to, there's no excuse pls protect him or her from w;s stuff. l'm not sure what you can do to guarantee she won't do that again if she was to come home , but as you know your child is innocent in it all and that bs just can not happen again.

Sadly though , it reminds me of my gf's son's situation. He moved over here 10yrs ago and later met a Japanese girl who had also moved over here. The first few yrs were gorgeous you even see it in their photos. Unfortunately they had two kids in a row she started getting weird next minute took of to Japan and wouldn't come back.21/2 yrs ago now they're divorcing he's over there now just trying to be near his kids and she's completely lost it. Apparently she did have problems but then the kids but she also hated it here at any rate though sadly it's done.

Sorry l don't really have any advice as such but pls hang in there for your child and self too.

rx