Stuck in mud

[Portia18]

Hello - I’m a newbie on this forum. I’m a senior, with no family and little outside support. I’ve been struggling with depression and anxiety for quite a while now. I have really bad days but do have some reasonably good days too so I’m all over the place. I’m recognising in myself huge lacks in motivation, self-discipline and with waaay too much procrastination about doing what I know will help me so I can move on. I’ve felt so bad for so long I don’t know how to be any other way. I almost have this feeling of being uncomfortable to be happy again - I’m stuck in a BIG rut. Can someone please help?

[Ggrand]

Hello Portia,

Welcome to Beyond Blue Forums, We are a friendly, kind and caring group of people who are happy to help you the best we can.

I can relate to a lot of your story, I'm also a senior, lonely depressed and sad..My family all live over 7-8 hours drive away and I rarely see them..

Depression and anxiety does cause us to loose our motivation, self discipline and keeps us from being happy,

I tried to fix myself of depression for a couple of years and failed at it. Eventually I made an appointment with my gp and told him of how I was feeling, my fears, not wanting to get out of bed etc..She listened and gave me a referral to a psychologist where a mental health care plan was put into action and now I have improved, it's really very hard if not impossible to heal yourself of depression, Please can you try and get some professional help..( only suggesting professional help. it's up to you )..

What I do when I have negative thoughts is to distract my thoughts onto something I like doing. Internet games, tv, puzzles, music, meditation, your mind can only think one thought at a time, so by doing what you like it gives your mind a rest from negative thoughts,..

There is a thread here on getting our daily routine back...in the search box on this page at the top right hand corner please search...Depression and our daily routine...it may help you get motivated even a little, which is good..

Feel free to check out the forums, when you feel to, This is your thread now, and yours to talk whenever you feel up to it..Please keep in touch and let us know how you are going..

Kind thoughts,

Grandy..

[Speak Your Truth]

Good ideas that I need to think about too Grandy, thank you 🙏

[Portia18]

Grandy your reply is appreciated.

i do see a doctor. I am very tired all the time and feel so weak and can’t yet even begin to pull myself out of this. I feel like I want 24/7 company and support, someone to push and encourage me because I can’t do it myself.

i feel so low I haven’t got words

[Ggrand]

Dearest Portia,

Im so sorry, Deprsession will make you feel the way you have just described how your feeling...

Living alone is so hard to motivate ourselves, I know as I live alone, in a tiny 200 residents small central west village..No friends i moved here two years ago, because financial reasons made it necessary, that's another story..The locals have all grown up together and I'm the outsider..

I have spent days in bed, unmotivated to get up..other days I would get up and move myself to the lounge and stay there until bed...I don't see anyone 6 days out of 7 so my days are long, lonely and sad....just about daily I would be crying most of the day...I searched google for motivation, when I came across anidea on getting back a daily routine..as I was writing it on paper I was also doing it to prove to myself that it would work, and it did..It got me out of bed, got my bed made and breakfast..

I found that once you do these little chores, that you do get a little bit of energy back...I eventually even went for a walk a few times...

Portia, you haven't been this way always, and believe me you won't be this way always either..this is a phase your going through and i as well as others will try and guide you and help you through it..You are not your depression Portia, you are stronger then your depression you just need to find that strength and want to get you started on your way to wellness.

There are a lot of threads in our wellness section, Please if you feel up to it, just look around for them and other threads here, you'll find things that might relate to how your feeling, join in the conversation if you feel up to it or just read... Portia you say you are seeing a dr, is he/she gp or psychologist?

Looking forward to hearing how you're getting on..

kind thoughts.

Grandy..

[fistfullofglitter]

I understand, someone to motivate you to seek your purpose. I believe we lack support groups in Australia, I've searched for people to connect with that share similar trauma, so we can learn from each other and support each other more, but haven't been able to find anything.

Have you got a friend or acquaintance that you can start organizing outings with, give yourself something to look forward to

Fistfullofglitter ❤️

[Ggrand]

Hello Icecream,

Welcome to the forums,

Im really sorry that your feeling angry, tired and sad,

Can I ask you why or what has caused you to feel angry tired and sad? only if you feel to answer..no pressure..

Icecream, you have landed onto a supporting thread for Portia, if you could go back to home page, then click onto welcome and orientation, then new threads you can start your very own thread that would make it a lot easier for you to get the support you need... You're welcome to stay here as well but it's really hard to support 2 individual topics on one thread..

Good luck and I'll keep an eye out for your new thread.

Kind thoughts, Grandy.

I

[Speak Your Truth]

Again, thanks Grandy.

ive looked at some of the pages you suggested and, don’t like saying it, but found myself thinking ‘yes, but ... ‘ or ‘good idea, tomorrow ... ‘ - just excuses. I’m so good at excuses because ... I’m too tired ? too something ....

this might help you, saw on the abc website ‘Residents of Australia's tiniest towns share what happiness means for them’ if you google that it will come up.

seeing my gp again next week, getting some Beyond Blue New Access support next week too

Don’t want to but got to shower and go out now Grandy, thanks

[Speak Your Truth]

Oops - Grandy I thought I was on my thread, but I replied to you on Portia’s thread. Sorry Portia. I’m so not with it. We have things in common it seems.

[Portia18]

That’s ok, I know the feeling.