struggling with unhelpful thoughts

[boatee]

been diagnosed with mixed anxiety/depression,seeing counsellor,using other stratergies,but still having very tough time dealing with the unhelpfful thoughts,set off by small things,lots bad medical help[none for most of it],former very heavy drinker & find even doing all i know still doesn't help at times,end up so overwhelmed have to go to ed for extra help,anyone got any more helpful advice,all help greatly appreciated

[Just Sara]

Hey and welcome Boatee;

Reaching out for help on here is a massive gutsy first start, so well done! It takes real courage to write about yourself on a public forum, though anonymity does help to curb the fear of being identified.

You haven't given a lot of info, but in saying that, you've given enough for a good beginning, and that's what counts. I'm wondering what's your biggest issue out of what you've mentioned.

Overcoming a substance addiction is a huge effort on your part, no doubt about that, congratulations! How long has it been? Are you in recovery?

Did your problems with mental health begin after drinking, during or before? I ask this as timing's important for recovery. I've asked a lot of questions because I'd like to get to know you better ok. Please don't think I'm being nosey.

I've suffered with complex post traumatic stress disorder (ptsd), anxiety/panic and depressive moods nearly my whole life, but was only diagnosed a few yrs ago. This is what bought everything together re understanding myself and my behaviour, and then recovery.

When you mentioned medical support, does this include psychological treatment/therapy? It can take a while to find someone you click with; I get this. Are you on medication? Are you sleeping ok?

Sigh...I'm sorry for all these questions. It's a habit of mine. I suppose getting to know you and your issues better makes it easier for me to help you.

Anyway, I've given you something to think about and that's what we do here. We're all really caring and compassionate people who want to be of service to others as a way to combat our own mental health issues.

I look forward to hearing back from you...

Kind thoughts...

Sez

[geoff]

hi Boatee, I also want to welcome you to the forum, and if you google 'intrusive thoughts' then up will come an enormous site where so many people, including myself have posted.
People who have these thoughts can also have OCD which is related to anxiety, so it would be great to hear back from you. Geoff.

[boatee]

thanks for the welcome,problems started with my first partner[she was very domineering],me a quite person[brought up to respect people],that's when drinking started heavy,never was given any info on what to do after stopping the drink,no rehab,two stays in mental ward within 3 months,found psychologist by myself,currently on two meds for problems,now seeing counsellor closer to home[anxiety in traffic,lots road works near me],GP understanding,worked for federal govt when first having problems,but not offered help,2 of my 3 children with that partner suffering problems as well,eldest got his own help without telling me until recently,other won't do anything to help herself,even after Dr advicing her[putting stresses back on everyone because won't listen],& i've done my best,plus have been doing on-line course through MindSpot Clinic,but struggling with it,because most of time find it hard to comprehend, that makes it hard for me to put pen to paper as the saying goes,find it easier talking face to face majority of the time,been ringing Lifeline,Mens Health Line & Beyond Blue when nothing works[become overwehlmed, or ring ambo's to get to hospital,my safety measure,have been in hospital 10 times in past 10 years with bodt part ops which doesn't help things,plenty of different sports from 6yrs old,slowed up now because of the injuries,trying other things,but takes time,trying not to overload head with to much,thanks

[Just Sara]

Well I asked for it didn't I? You've covered my questions well and then some, so thankyou B.

I've been online posting for most of the day, so I'll make this a quick reply and try to get back to you asap. Just know I care and want nothing more than to support and encourage you without judgement ok.

It's obvious you're doing everything you can to not only deal with your own recovery, but support your kids too. That's admirable and worthy of praise...well done!

Although you've been in hospital quite a few times, you're self aware and that's a massive plus. (I know the consequences of sporting injuries too btw. I'm old hat at surgery) You're able to reach out for help as well which means you've learned self reliance.

What can I say B? You seem to have great coping strategies and self knowledge. How can I help to improve things? Or is that a stupid question? I hope not.

I've got to go unfortunately; I hope you understand. I'll be back asap ok.

Kind thoughts;

Sez

[boatee]

thanks for the support S,but have had thoughts at differing times of hurting my eldest daughter to get through to her[haven't done it],because i know her mother was majority of her angst,causing the problems & she now has 3 children[oldest 2 and half and already pregnant again],plus i also do buddhist meditation one day a week & guided meditation another day,but at times[more than less], 1 step forward ends up being 5 steps backwards which doesn't help[massive frustration] making me feel hopeless/useless lots of the time.as with what i've said,i get things stuck in my head & even with all i know i

[boatee]

thanks for the support S,but at times i've wanted to hurt my eldest daugther[haven't,restrained myself] just to get the point across,but knowing some of what her mother put her through[ i don't know it all] i can understand,but extremely hard to be restrained at times. i used to be very strong willed person[capricorn],but not now,& every time i take 1 step forward i end up going back 5 steps which makes me feel" useless/hopeless",plus i do buddhist meditation once a week & guided meditation another day in each week,but even with everything i'm doing i get that one little thing in my head that just brings all the good work undone,then i'm down to the low ebb,just have to get the unhelpful thoughts under control[ not comprehending things],then i'll be going forward better,but having 1 good eye & 1 partial good eye[bad cataracts,1 eye fixed,loss of independence] hasn't helped of late.going to talk today to do with mental health and see what i can get from there,anything to stop this cycle to get life back

[boatee]

hi geoff,thanks for the welcome & place to look on the net,all help appreciated greatly,but i've been really struggling with these unhelpful thoughts as i've mentioned,had more yesterday[wed],with still little bit now,because this has only really come to surface properly in past 18 months[since stopped drinking],but in past 6-8 weeks it's been unbearable at times, & even doing everything i've learnt doesn't help putting me in the lowest ebbs of despair[won't hurt myself], & yes, i know it's a slow process, plus my expectations for myself to get this right are probably to high,but never until recently have i been given any proper info on what's happening or side effects to the problem,so any extra help is wonderful/helpful,just got to try not to overload myself & make things worse,thanks