Dear Happy Girl
I am so pleased you found this forum and have made your first post. A warm welcome to you.
I can certainly relate to 'don't speak, bottle it all up' process as I did that for many years. I thought I was the only one who felt that way and was rather ashamed at what I saw as my weakness. Well I feel apart at work one day and a colleague took me to a local GP and I was given a referral to a psychiatrist. By the way, just because I said psychiatrist does not mean I think this is what you need. I was in a very bad way at that point.
How can I help you? Well first of all please feel free to say whatever you wish on this forum. It's a safe place to let your hair down and bring out the skeletons. Your description of how you feel makes me wonder if you are getting anxious or a bit depressed. How does that sound? Sometimes we don't know why we feel a certain way but talking to someone can help you identify your core problem.
With this in mind I want to suggest you have a chat to your GP. These hard working doctors are amazing at spotting the problem and offering a way to get on top of everything. It may be you simply need someone to talk to, perhaps see a counsellor. I know when these things are suggested it can be a bit scary. We have all sorts of ideas about professional mental health people and how bad it would be if we needed their help.
The truth is we all need help at some time in our lives. Not necessarily mental health but an opportunity to talk to someone who can be objective and help you navigate the tangled roads we travel. This can be a spouse or parent, even a sibling at times. Teachers, good friends, grandparents, the list goes on. Who do you think you would be comfortable talking to? I suggest your GP because I presume you have some relationship with him/her even though you do not need a consultation very often.
Make an appointment, a long one would be good, and take a copy of your post above. I know how easy it can be to walk away and then realise you have not said everything you wanted to say. Why not print out the post and add anything you have thought of afterwards. You can give it to your GP or read it to them.
I hope you will continue to post here and we will offer support. Sometimes a reply may take a little time as no one is writing here 24/7. If you feel distressed or need to talk to someone quickly then phone the beyond blue 24/7 service on 1300 22 4636.
Mary
