Missing depressed girlfriend

[Mickods]

Me and a woman started seeing each other in a casual NSA relationship. We were together about 7 months. About 5 months in she wanted to talk about how her feelings had changed and she was wanting to take it to try for a committed relationship. Which I was more then happy with as I felt the same. About a month after that she started getting bit flakey and distant, when I asked her what was going on if she’d been having second thoughts she said everything was fine and work was just really busy and her daughter had been sick. We went back to normal for about 2 weeks before it started again. When I asked her about it she opened up to me that our relationship had started to bring back memories of past feelings for her ex husband and how he cheated on her and that she was scared of being in a relationship with all these insecurities she had started feeling. I assured her that I wasn’t her ex and that I wouldn’t do that to her. But she kept getting more and more distant and eventually didn’t want to see me and would only reply to my texts with simple answers. Then after a week of not hearing from her she texts me to say she needs some time to herself away from any type of relationship as she’s moved into a depressive state. So that she can work on her own mental health. I said to her I understand and if that’s what she feels she needs to get her self into a good headspace I wouldn’t stop her from doing what she feels best. And if she ever needs anything I’m always here for her. She followed up by telling me she loves me, which was the first time she’s actually said that. I’m actually kicking myself now as I feel like I love her but didn’t say it back to her. She then said once she gets herself to where she needs to be to feel happy with herself again I would be her first call and she’s never met anyone as caring and patient as me. I miss her like crazy and can’t stop thinking about her. I’ve tried working extra hours, hobbies and hanging with friends to try and take my mind off her but as soon as I’m alone all I can do is think about her and wondering how she is doing. I haven’t contacted her as she asked me not to and she would contact me when she felt it was right. I respect she needs her space and I know over time I will start to come to terms with it and I shouldn’t expect any big changes in her wellbeing anytime soon as it’s goong to be a long process but I just can’t seem to stop thinking about her and how she is and how much I miss her and being around her

[quirkywords]

Mickods

Welcome to the forum and well done for making your first thread,

I am glad your girlfriend could explain how she was feeling and explain what was happening to her and what she needed, sometimes partners are left bewildrered when the other partner leaves suddenly with no explanation.

This is painful for you but at least you you know the reason fir her change of behaviour,

She is working hard on her issues and she appreciates hiw caring yiu are and wants to contact you as soon as she feels better,I know she dies the want to contact her but maybe you could write a few letters to you her and nit send them but write out how you feel for her,

it may me so hard fir you as you miss her so much but yiu know what she wants you to do.

Deoression is an awful thing and sometimes you push away those you love the most, she seems to know what she needs to heal . She has told you what she means to you.

if you browse other threads in the relationship section you may find some that you can relate to,

Keep posting here if you want, You are not alone and there is support here ,

quirky