Introduction

[Carmen02]

I am 22 year old male from Sydney Australia, with depression which I have had since I was about 8 years old. I also have complex PTSD, anxiety and level 1 autism (low support needs). I have battled with mental illness for what seems to be my whole life. I struggle to function everyday, I can't seem to keep the apartment clean or shower, I only manage to get out of bed for work because otherwise I'd be screwed in this cost of living crisis. The days seem to blur together, and I'm unable to remember a lot of things because I believe I'm always dissociating. I don't feel like I'm living at all, just existing. I'm here because I need a place to type out what I am experiencing and maybe find other people who can understand what I go through. I've tried professional therapy many times but it doesn't seem to be useful for me, I've even had a few flat out tell me that they can't help me. I've tried many different medications which have either done nothing or done more damage. I feel like a lost cause and a burden on others. 

[Croix]

Dear Carmen02~

I'd like to welcome you here to the forum, where you wil find other whose experiences have not been good and wish to share and help.

It sounds as if life had handed you a pretty hard time and there is not much in it you like. Actually not doing housework is not that bad in hte overall scheme of things , and just the bare minimum in going to work is a bit of a triumph.

As someone who has bouts of depression and anxiety I can understand. I have found on tihng that has lightened life a little. I try to find or remember things I enjoy, or at least distract me.  I must admit I found it hard to think of them, but wiht help piled up quite a few. Anything from walking hte dog to a tv show to a chapter in a book or YouTube comedians or ... well what you like will be different from me.

I try to do one thing of an evening. It serves several purposes, giving me something ot look forward to each day, making me feel a bit better at the time and over time letting me start to feel I deserve a reward.

Perhaps something along the same lines might assist - what do you think?

Croix

[Lyn_Dog]

Hi there and thank you for sharing your experiences. You are doing amazing going to work everyday despite how you are feeling. This is a massive achievement. 

I wouldn't worry too much about housework. There are days when I'm all over it or like the last couple of days where the dishes and clothes are stacking up. 

I'm 39 years old and live with GAD, OCD and depression. I'm barely functioning too at the moment and work so I don't become homeless. I wasn't diagnosed until my late 20's and its only been the last few years I have started to understand the impact of my conditions. In my 20's I couldn't understand why things such as going to work or trying to find a partner was so difficult. I have a better understanding now and a bit more compassion for myself.

Try not to be too hard on yourself. You are juggling many things on top of difficult economic conditions. I hope you find connection, help and understanding within this forum. You are doing amazing and you are worthwhile.