Does my son have symptoms of anxiety?

[millybay]

my son is 21 and a psychology student in second year and doing really wel plus he works part time but he has been following buddhist beliefs this past year which has worsened traits he has for constantly re-arranging how he plans things and being a control freak over himself and everyone else. Now with his buddhist reading he has done things like try to force the neighbours cows on our property to give them more feed. Refuse to let the dogs be kept in a race for 20 minutes a day while I feed the chickens. Says my cooking is too good and that food shouldn't be enjoyable. Tells his brother not to play video games, tells me I should keep away from the computer even though I have been practicing programming for 10 years. Tonight he pulled the plug on a phone call with a friend because he said her talk was negative and not good for me. He is always obsessing over what his daily routine should be.The list goes on. What can I do to help him...is this a form of anxiety? He doesn't drink or smoke but he does occasionally smoke marijuana and he's even worse then.

[geoff]

dear Millbay, this is an interesting post, but I don't know what the buddhist beliefs are, but I would be interested to know whether your son had displayed any signs of performing any OCD traits before he joined the buddhist beliefs, as he now seems to perform signs of having OCD. Geoff.

[AGrace]

Hi millybay,

I'm not sure if your sons thoughts are related to mental illness or whether he's found a faith that he feels he can easily subscribe to. 

I think more than resisting his beliefs or behaviours I'd try to involve yourself so that you can get a better understanding of how realistic he's being or whether he's taking these beliefs to a literal extreme. 

There are plenty of Buddhism sites and schools across Australia. Perhaps you could suggest you both attend a session together? Maybe have a chat with the facilitator. I'd then have a chat with your son about supporting his desire to follow these beliefs but being clear that you would rather he not impose them on others who might share different beliefs. Perhaps talk about the idea of food not being enjoyable and invite him to start cooking for himself so he can follow his beliefs as an example. 

We can't really choose belief systems for our children, but we can support them in their personal discovery whilst setting boundaries around how they impact on others.

AGrace

[AGrace]

Hi millybay,

I wanted to check in and see how things are travelling with you and your son.

I'm not sure if you have managed to visit any of the other threads created by members who are seeking help supporting their family/friends through mental illness?

You might want to visit some of the following threads to see if you can extract any suggestions that may be helpful:

Supporting a family member with Depression & Anxiety

Need help dealing with my daughters depression

You can simply enter these headings into the search function at top right of screen.

Let us know how you get on.

AGrace