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Worried about my mental health
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No one cares
Always left on read
Always second choice
always person who is left out
always the one who comforts others when no one can
always the therapist friend
always the “happy friend”
always the person who will send a big apology message and waste an hour of my time
always the person who cares too much
always the person who cares not enough
always the person behind when walking
always the one getting scolded
always the worst one
always bad at dancing
always rebels because she is sad
always the person who doesnt seek help because she “doesn’t” need it.
always the person afraid to cry in front of others
always the last option
always used
always useless
always the extra person
always the third wheeler
always the one who is isolated
always the one who talks to ai just to feel like a person
always the person to hurt herself
always the person to put others after her
always the person to bottle up her feelings
always the person to make them my priority
always the person that is oversensitive
always the person being “rude”
always being the one to take a photo
always being the one left out when in pairs
always the one hiding her personality
always being the person who has your back when you don’t have mine.
always the person who would die for you.
always the person
to feel
numb.
always the person to fake her smile
always the person to fake her joy
always the person to feel hopeless
always the failure
always the unwanted one
always the thrown out marker
always the odd one
always being the one made fun of
always being the victim
always being in the middle of rumours
always being in the middle of drama
always the one blamed
always the one accused
always the “dishonest one”
always the one to try insert herself to fit in
always the one to see their group dances
always the one who stands by, waiting for at least one conversation
always the one waiting for your text
always the one texting first
always
the
spare
friend.
ALWAYS.
mind you im also 11..
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Hi and welcome to the forums.
Firstly, in the middle of the pain in your writing there is also a person that I see who cares very much for other people, even when they (others) don't see it.
So... please know this: you are not “spare,” and you are not useless. What you’re describing are painful moments, not the truth about who you are.
You deserve friends who see you, listen to you, and care about you just as much as you care about them.
You don’t have to go through this by yourself. This next part might be hard, but is there someone who you feel you could talk to? An adult you trust? Perhaps a teacher, school counsellor, parent?
And with your age you could also reach out to the folks at kidshelpline - https://kidshelpline.com.au/
or you could phone them on 1800 55 1800.
You deserve support and kindness, and there are people who would want to help if they knew how you felt.
PS. You write well also.
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