Hate this.

[Rothman]

Hey.. need advice. 28 (nearly 29) yo f.

Been self harming, not eating, depressed for.. damn.. 18years now.

Cant go to gp alone, boyfriend says "go ahead off self if that selfish"

Cant hospital.. ambo/cop (will get family evicted.. already happened twice lol)

Social anxiety, phone phobias, no webcams.. what.. do i.. its everyday now and no one cares?

[Rothman]

I've been trying alone so long, when I ask for help I'm told they give up trying. So I do too..?

I don't know.

[tranzcrybe]

Hi Rothman,

True help doesn't have an expiry date...

t.

[Ggrand]

Hello Dear Rothman..

Ive been listening here and can relate to you being scared to go to the Doctor alone..I was scared to even go shopping alone...

Rothman...Is it okay to ask you what you’re scared of..is it the travelling to get their... the Doctor...the people around you...the constant chatter in the waiting room?...For me it was all those that I mentioned....

I ran out of my heart medication..I had two choices to make...stay home and expect and wait for the worse to happen or take that long scary trip to see my Doctor...and then the chemist....I went to the Doctor then chemist...and straight home...I did it was all I could think about the next couple of days...Going to the dr..isn’t that scary or hard anymore...I’m even shopping on my own now ...It took that one time when I really didn’t have many choices that has helped me to be more comfortable in going out...

I hope eventually you can go....It’s really sad that your bf doesn’t care enough to take you and support you at the Doctors....

My kindest wishes and caring thoughts dear Rothman..

Grandy...

[Rothman]

@Ggrand

It's not that I'm scared.. well I am I guess.. it's just I can't go alone because I lie. I can't verbally ask for help. On the phone Or in person..

Just smile, everything is fine.. yep I'll eat, yep I'll stop drinking smoking hurting self.. lies lies lies..

Thats why I can't alone.

[Ggrand]

Dearest Rothman...

I think we all tell those little white lies at times..about eating, smoking, hurting ourselves, drinking etc...but it’s really not beneficial for your health...Which I feel you know that already..

Okay..maybe theirs a way around it...Um would it be possible to write things down on a sheet of paper before you visit your Doctor about how your struggling atm...then hand it to your dr...

Rothman..it’s so important to tell the dr exactly how you’re feeling...if not verbally..then on a sheet of paper...I’m worried about you Rothman...I know it’s very difficult to do..Please try as hard as you can...for you, you deserve your health, peace and happiness in your life...and I’m certain if you take that very hard first step, talking honestly to your dr. they can help you...I can hear in your post that you want to be helped, you want to get better...

Please dear Rothman..never give up on yourself...

my care and kind thoughts..

Grandy.l

[Rothman]

Even if I write it down I can't physically go or call a doctor for help myself.. I've tried googling email GPS I just.. if boyfriebd/old man that live with me.. if they can't see I need help I just can't myself..

I just.. can't? I dunno..

Sending love to everyone, stay safe xx

[tranzcrybe]

Hi Rothman,

Not phone, not in person... but plenty of space here on this forum and lots of caring ears to hear your story. You may feel better just by talking about anything in your past or present - I'm sure someone here will have something in common to share and help you see you are not alone through all this.

Want to give it a go?

t.

[Rothman]

HI where do u want me to start..

I don't know what you want.. 😞

[tranzcrybe]

I don't really know either, Rothman -

Maybe just pick one experience and see how you feel afterwards? Small steps...

t.

[Rothman]

I just.. I self harm a lot and I'm struggling to get help? Like I guess it's not bad boyfriend knows coworkers know I just suck I dunno I hurt and I just hate life so much I just I don't know anymore..