Vent and then let it go...

[Guest_1055]

Not sure about anyone else but sometimes I just need to vent, including venting any frustrations, fears, hopes, worries, longings and anything else. Most of the time I don't want any advice or any responses. Just need a way to get it all out from within me.

So thought this thread could be for those sort of things. No one replys to you with words or anything. It's a place to let it all go. Just dump whatever it is you want to say and leave it here.

So yeah no replys please.

[Guest_1643]

thank you boudica, some days are just awful. but ur right there is always a new day on the horizon.

[golden82]

Still neighbour noise.. still tired and can't sleep due to his noise. And ate too much, tummy pain, just in pain/aches 😞 will life ever be okay? I just want calm and peace and can't even get that in my own living room!!

[Guest_1643]

hey Golden, I really feel for u. Argh. The worst. You must be tired. Did you get any rest at all today? Not even sleep, but a little wind-down time?
So annoying that he is insensitive and blaring his tv. That's exhausting to have to deal with. Hugs.

Feeling a bit of physical pain today which is more annoying and niggling

Haven't kept up much with journalling or anything I did in hospital, and now obsessing and being anxious about if i'll go to my Mh group this week as I didn't really like it last week, and I have other things I want to do. Stupid things. Like go for lunch with a friend. The group was boring and weird. i think i've answered my own question.

[golden82]

Thanks; no rest unfortunately as i was too wound up and zombie like and the noise was non stop. I have spoken to him several weeks back. He is fake nice. All smiles, but no change in behaviour. In fact he got worse. Slammed a door the other morning at 1.17am i jolted awake and no sleep. Only what i got from midnight til 1.17am. It is deliberate for sure. Just clearly likes to be a pain. For ppl like us with trauma though it makes feeling safe and peace so much harder. And not much can be done. He is not doing anything illegal, just being a prick.

Journaling can be good. I hope you can pick the best choice. I can't do groups anymore. Get too triggered. Have a 1:1 community worker for a few sessions. That is more my level at moment. Everyone is pushing for me to join groups but i am learning to follow my feeling more and not get pushed around by the set model of 'recovery' from trauma but do what i can manage.

I trust you will be able to do the same and know which things are right for you. You are very aware Sleepy, remember that and listen to yourself. X

[Guest_1643]

Hey Golden,

I relate very very much to wht you feel about the noise. I have terrible blinds and my neighbours can see into my apartment and I can't tell u how stiff it makes me feel in my body and mind, hypervigilante and aware.
The noises would be very hard.

I am so sorry and wish you had that calm space, noisy neighbours are so triggering. It is so important for us to have that space that is just ours. That is free from intrusion in all forms.
I feel very vulnerable that my space is "on display" and it makes me feel upset.

This week I am getting new blinds finally after a year and I am so excited. They are special ones where I get some light but they aren't see through, so I can have space to hide and be me. I wander if that will take away some of my anxiety.

The neighbour u mentioned being fake nice is all the more frustrating. Im sorry your sleep was so distrupted. Hope you get better rest tonight....

Thnks for ur encouragement re the mental health group and reminding me to trust my intuition. sometimes we push ourselves too hard and I feel like a failure if something doesn't work out. But our intuition is so powerful. It has been numb in me for too long.

[Guest_1643]

i have had the exact same comment now from about 5 ppl in my life after i went to hospital for MH

"I can't imagine what it's like for u going to hospital."

I am so tired of this comment. Why can't you imagine? Am i on another planet or in a different hemisphere?

It makes me feel seperate and different. Sometimes, some of us go to mental health hospital for treatment for difficultes we face. It's pretty easy to imagine. Hospital food, a little bed, nurses and meds, i'm sure if ppl gave it a shot they could imagine it without difficulty. it's not that confusing.

It's just that ppl don't want to imagine it, because they're scared. Scared of admitting it could happen to them. So they put you in a "too hard" basket of someone , one of "those" who has MH issues.
Everyone struggles with MH on a continuum. If u can imagine ever having a terrible day just multiply it by 10 days and imagine being in hospital where they help you with it so you can feel better.

It's a simple concept!

[Guest_1055]

Feeling so very ugly today.

Hate that I cannot talk to people properly. The conversation does not go back and forth

Extended birthday coming up. Already feeling fear about it

[Boudica]

I have had a sense of doom bearing down upon me recently, like a big black cloud hanging over my shoulder. Vamoose black cloud of doom, let there be light!

[Arzz]

First time on here can't seem to get to sleep.....scrolling thru forum I felt drawn to your post I feel very much the same just can't get my head around it flashback memories of accident makes me feel frustration anger I feel like the dark cloud wont leave I need that sunshine feeling

[Guest_1643]

take care everyone. i know how hard it is not to sleep. sending care for anyone having a long night.