Three self-care things you did today!

[ecomama]

We can do it BBers, we can do self-care.

Sleepy21 pointed out research that shows self-care REALLY helps!

Please share what you do for self-care so we can get inspiration, ideas and motivation to do it too.

Best wishes
EM

[ecomama]

HI everyone!

Regardless of what self-care we did or didn't do... YOU'RE ALL AWESOME!

I just got some very sad news, so sad. My friend's mum passed away, I've known her since I was 9yo, the mum and dad took me overseas as a teenager with my friend too... just a lot of love for me, as mad as that family was and is lol... so I have a funeral to attend next week. There's more but it's too much to write.

So yes.
Lots of self-care needed here as I have SO MANY beautiful memories. Fun, silly, crazy. I;m really sad right now.

Thankyou all for being here.

Sleepy, I copped a stigmatising rant from a friend last week and I was taken aback by it.
She blamed me for what happened to Yvette.

Sleeps, you and I are deeper and stronger than that. Huge hugs, I know how much it hurts.
But I wouldn't want you to be any other way than your beautiful self that I know and love.
I have a specific finger for those people.
"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind".
Dr Seuss

Yes Not_Batman lol even Thai people LOVE chocolate cake!!
It was my eldest daughter's birthday dinner. I bought UNICORN candles for her cake! lol.
LOVE THE PAINTED nails lol!

You're powering through Blue, so happy you're here.

My self-care needs to increase a lot my Counsellor said today, this was before I found out about my friend's mum...
Today I was happily without a car:
* I stayed in my pyjamas all day, had to change them because I started gardening and the first lot got grotty lol
* accepted a take away breakfast
* had Thai leftovers for dinner
* watched lots of MAN DOWN lolololololol
* did lots of house mama stuff like moving indoor plants, began emptying wardrobe number 4 (found another 4 rolls of Christmas wrapping paper lol), packing my car with stuff for Charity
* setting up a Christmas present wrapping station because it gets MESSY with all the kids wrapping presents now too!
* did exposure therapy to alleviate my nightmares.

Yes I consider these all self-care because I felt better for doing them.
Not that my Counsellor agrees! lol.

Love EM.

[Clues_Of_Blue]

PinkFeather, I think you've nailed self care, your nature day sounds lovely.

No worries, Sleepy. I won't advocate for a favourite frozen dessert - I'm a foodie, I love so many things!

Thanks for the kind words, EM. Self care is definitely needed in the wake of your sad news, and the crap things your friend said to you. You've done really well with that whole list (most definitely including the minimising, haha), counsellors aren't always right! Have tried to put a pic of my nails up, but it hasn't come through yet.

Failing a bit with self care today, my little family have all been needing a lot of my attention which means ol' Blue being very inactive when she wants to be active. Of course I want to be there for my man and my birds. I also really want to get stuck into some work! They all say no. 😕

[Guest_1643]

- a portugeuse tart with berries - quite a situation lol. Yum

- was truthful about my experience gettng help for work - didn't sugarcoat it and let it be what it was (bad)

- will try have a hot drink

[ecomama]

Hi PinkFeather!

PinkFeather said:
"Hello ecomama, I loved your warm welcome and thanks so much for this thread. It's such a lovely way to get to know you all and to nail in some positive vibes. Big hugs to everyone else too, thank you for sharing."

TOTALLY OUR PLEASURE I'm sure. It's SO GOOD to have you here!
I thought you were going to put a quip in about the "nails" lol!
Because even our Not_Batman who really IS Batman has had his nails painted.

"Today was good, not one anxiety attack!"

WOOHOO! What a GREAT day that is lol.

"Tended to my animals and took the time to absorb their contented sounds as they ate. I did that! Made other beings feel safe and cared for."

Awww so sweeet!
You'd be right at home in Grandy's animal thread lol.

"Weeded my veggie patch."

NOT that I want you out of HERE but you'd be at home in my Who else likes gardening? thread lol!!! That one's FULL of people loving to grow stuff.

"I must always remember it is nature that soothes my soul in the dark times."

Such a powerful thing to remember.
I'm so glad you can acknowledge the power of healing in nature.
It was my garden that healed my depression years ago.
So soothing for the soul.

And a belated VERY warm welcome to you!

Love EM

[ecomama]

Cheeses Sleepy you're making me quite envious! lol.

A "tart situation" I could appreciate right about now lol.

LOVE YOUR WORK!!!!
Truly amazing Sleeps.

Onwards and UPwards!

Lol I forgot to list, ahem, my version self-care.

Today I:
* bought a fresh blueberry, pineapple and orange juice at the shopping centre today. YUM!

* visited my friend T who lost her mum this week and we looked at gorgeous photos of her as a child and had a little cry.

* drank LOTS of water.

* made up with my son's gf immediately when they got here. She seems REALLY happy and relaxed again now, so that's awesome. This is a very important relationship to me.

* delegated a task which worked out well (for a change lol!).

* came onto BB forums, obviously, which is definitely time for me and touching base with my treasured BB family.

EMxxxx

[PinkFeather]

Thank you again ecomama, I feel your warmth and feel special for your consideration of my post. Your thoughtfulness has touched another soul, I hope this knowledge touches you back.

I feel like I am at somewhat at a precipice in life, decisions made now will have far reaching effects, so I find myself in a state of statis. This is ok. Sometimes it is the right not to act, but for the first time I am aware of it, and I cannot explain the relief this has given my mind for maybe the first time in my life (I am 50's). So this is where I'm at...now for my 3 lovely things:

1. Understanding that non-action is sometimes the right action. I heard the mouse-wheel creaking to a stop over this.
2. Had an afternoon sleep while listening to an audio-book, unfortunately the quest to find something along the lines of guided-meditation led to frustration, so instead said to myself "truck it, I just want some great story telling", so found one of my favourite authors and let the magic of well crafted words carry me away.
3. Made a great tea for my husband and shared a glass of wine and tv show before retiring to "my room" which was once just a spare room. It's been two weeks now but perhaps we have a way forward in friendship.

[ecomama]

Dear PinkFeather, you're most welcome. Hugs.

I intuited half way through your 2nd post what seemed to be confirmed towards the end of it.

You spoke in the way I felt a number of years ago.

Hopefully you never have to endure what I've had to moving forward from that point.

I'm a bit older than you.

You are ALWAYS welcome to share whatever you want to or need to share right here and without any mention of self-care either lol.

I'm not sure if you've done so already or even if you would care to do this, you are always welcome to begin a thread of your own so that others may give more specific support and understanding, NOT saying we wouldn't do so here either lovely self-care peeps!!!
I'm sure we all would.

At that point back then after 2 weeks, I went and watered every single plant and tree that I'd ever planted and even those I inherited with the property.... I cried so hard and apologised to each one, saying that I wanted to stay but I would Pray for the next custodians to love them just as much as I had.
I thanked them all too.

After several years (and hellfire) I secured the property in my sole name and the rest is herstory.

I know this time you're going through. I don't know anything about what you're going through at the same time lol.

Whatever it is, whatever time of night or day, we are ALWAYS here - someone is always on the forums - so please remember this.

We're holding your hand on your journey.

Love EM

[Clues_Of_Blue]

Another failing day. With return to my much hated job imminent the mood is going south and motivation with it. Not doing so well.

[Not_Batman]

Hi blues.

not good to hear. Whats failing that has you down?
May help to talk about what you dont like about you job.

any self care today?

i made christmas trees out if pallets.

Not_Batman

[Clues_Of_Blue]

Hey Not_Batman,

Failing at self care today was what I meant. Feeling kind of lost, like my time is now so limited and I don't know how best to use it (which sadly usually results in it getting wasted).

What don't I like about my job? So much. I work in a supermarket, in the online shopping department (preparing and taking out click and collect orders).

On a general level, it's promoting meat and junk food, mass produced packaging, rampant consumerism... Ol' Blue is vegetarian, big on healthy eating, environmentalist and minimalist. I'm sure you can see the disparity.

Further, it's customer service. I have people in my face all day which is hard on an introvert at the best of times, all the more in the midst of a pandemic when both customers and staff are poor at best with social distancing and appropriate hygiene, and I have a partner on immune suppressants after transplant surgery. Just a cold will mess him up, never mind covid.

Have tried for years to leave the place, a combination of a poor job market and my own mental health have made it impossible. Can't pay the bills on what the dole would be. So yeah, my job is trigger No. 1 for my depression and exhausts me so heavily my self care typically goes out the window in my inability to keep up with everything I need to do and I sorely don't want to be going back.

Managed one self care thing, wrote up a household job roster, giving my partner a few tasks he can manage in his reduced capacity (as much for his self esteem as for helping me), wrote "self care" as a "job" for both of us on the list every day of the week.

Nice work with the Christmas trees. 🙂

Blue.