:Like many confused souls on here, I have mental torment. I'm also
vulnerable particularly prior to the last 5 years. Since then wisdom has
grown- caught up to my 58 years near where it should be. A large part of
my vulnerability has been lack of wit...
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:Like many confused souls on here, I have mental torment. I'm also
vulnerable particularly prior to the last 5 years. Since then wisdom has
grown- caught up to my 58 years near where it should be. A large part of
my vulnerability has been lack of wit. Countless times when I've been
abused or slandered I've swallowed it and fumed for a long time. This
has resulted in the "steamer effect", my term to describe the pressure
cooker within.I havent had the wit to quickly react ideally in a
cordial, calm and measured manner to my opponent. "Opponent". Yes we are
talking duels here, a fact of life of fighting with other people, an act
many find a part of normal life. Once, only once, I predicted a person,
in this case my ex defacto partner, that she would approach me on a
topic. If so I had an answer for her- I'd had a hobby of building model
aircraft for 7 years. She didnt like me spending time at the field. She
one day sta down and lit up a *** and said "how much do you think you
have spent on your hobby in the last 7 years". I replied "$11,000". To
which she replied "are you proud of that"? I replied "far better than
the $35,000 you have spent on chain smoking cigarettes". The topic was
abandoned. And the topic never resurfaced. I call that premeditated WIT.
But premeditated wit does not exist IMO. It was planned to equalise an
onslaught of criticism that I believed was not necessary. So, I've seen
people in my many workplaces use wit as quick as lightning. A response
that leaves the aggressor in their wake or commences a debate. But I
dont have that automatic response mechanism in my brain. What is the
result of that absence? Torment!! And the long term effect- hibernation.
In my case, as stated many times now- hibernation means not locking
myself away but some withdrawal from society. Fewer of all people in the
end. Fewer meetings with people, fewer clubs to join, fewer facebook
friends etc. Effectively, rather than growing wit, I've compensated with
less people of whom could hurt me with contact in the first place. The
result is less torment. And a happier life. Do any of you have ideas on
finding wit? For me I'd need to be on my toes constantly, viewing
everyone as a potential enemy. I just want to respond to those abusers
out there in an automatic way, to guard myself against humans that feed
from nastiness.....