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Friend's Trouble!

Bags27
Community Member

Hi.. I am really struggling. My husband and I are a part of a group of 11 people... most peoplr are nice but there are 3 people that make me very stressed and uncomfortable. They keep talking about having amazing jobs and how they own 2 properties in Sydney. They keep telling us to do the same things with out understanding our situation.

 

I am struggling because on the one hand I am feeling guilty cause I said some things to them and now I feel like I am the bad person.  There Is another couple interested group that is also often bullied by them but they don say anything to their face but have told me in confidence that they have felt hurt too. I am just feeling really sad and don't know what to do. Any advice is welcomed

1 Reply 1

white knight
Community Champion
Community Champion

Hi, welcome 

 

Commonly, friendships and in some cases even blood relatives are best seen as "fluid" and they ebb and flow from our lives. This when accepted is the least form of stress in dealing with relationships.  Eventually, you end up with more quality people around you.

 

In a group of 11, I would think it normal to have up to 6 incompatible friends on average. 

 

I was in a group where the bragging got beyond me. My 1st wife and I were indeed financially challenged and my SIL won a new car through a raffle. I heard and rang to congratulate her when she said "I'm angry, it hasn't even got a radio". Raffle prizes often include the lowest priced model.

But then another comment "well you can't win it if you aren't in it" then, "you get what you pay for" in response I replied "you get what you can afford". 

 

I wrote a post called (google: beyondblue wit, the only answer to torment"

 

It deals with how to respond to irritating comments. A few very choice words can hit the target.

 

It might be time to form a smaller group starting with that friend you spoke to. 

 

Considerate people have insight to the sensitivity of others, it's a DNA thing...

 

I hope that helps.