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There is a flip side
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"There is a positive to every negative in life"
Those words yelled at me and ten other insurance salespersons in 1982 changed my life forever.
It took a while to fully convince myself of Bills words of motivation. After all, how can you find positives in the death if a loved one? But the death if a loved one is a fact of life, not an event within our daily lives where choices can be made.
Practice makes perfect. 34 years later a couple if weeks ago in tropical heat my wife and I had a tough time in our tiny caravan in the tropics waiting for our car to be fixed. Google Topic: great expectations- beyondblue
Hands over my face totally distraught at being abandoned by our travelling friends I found it really hard to find positives. So I searched for some. I'm always one to promote a change of environment to spark some hope.
I met "Patrick" an indigenous fellow sitting on a naturestrip. He told me about his elders, the original owners of the land I stood. I offered appreciation for his elders, my respect then returned to our van.
Had I not been so distraught and in desperation left the van at that time, I would not have met that amazing man. There was the positive.
You lose your best friend? Find the positive. Whether it leads to finding another or even if you extend your love to them in the hope they are happier moving on, best wishes can lead to a reunion not so far down the road of time. A well walked track left intact is better left as it is than bulldozed by feelings of rejection.
As often sad and depressed people our challenges are far greater than what's common. So we need to dig deeper, we need to keep a lot more faith in ourselves because at the time when in despair there seems to be none around. Despair feels like it will be never ending. Like we won't come out of it. I still have that feeling when deeply upset. A note in the clear plastic part of my wallet states - "it does get better".
Better to remember a burst of sun arriving than the rain falling.
Once you have become a positive thinker you never revert back. What's more you can pick a negative thinker every time because you no longer think that way. Furthermore you know you have little hope of changing people to become positive, it has to come from within, prompting helps like what Bill did for me but the rest was up to me.
Bill planted my seed. That seed became an old tree. That old tree is aging, a negative...but its dropped many other seeds....
Tony WK
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Hi Tony WK
another great topic. You always have a great sense of clarity. When you met 'Patrick' it would have been a 'positive reality check' to enable you to see the 'big picture' so to speak.
When my brother passed away I was understandably upset. Since he left us I am actually happy that he is in a better place now than the pain he was going through at the time. I do miss him so much but also do see the 'flip side' when it comes to his well being even after his passing.
Whether in a friendship or having a death in the family there is always a 'flip side'
Nice1 Tony WK. Paul
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Tony, you are incredible in the depths of despair over c'van, people letting you down, the sun still shone with the intervention of Patrick. Did you ever see the movie ' The Sound Of Music', (oldie, but goodie). If you did, you may remember when the captain returned from his honeymoon. His eldest daughter was lamenting to Maria over her lost love. Maria's wise reply, that no matter how dark it gets, the sun always returns. I try to live by the same philosophy. In my darkest hour, the sun did come out. A very caring person brought me into the sunshine by simply being in the right place. Patrick did the same for you.
Lynda