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whats next?

persistence
Community Member

just joined online forum and most afraid of being judged online but feel I have nowhere else to turn.

My husband has caught me cheating twice with the same person.The second time was different as I have been trying to distance myself from this person for over a year with no success.I have since filed a police report and left my job in order to make my marriage work.My husband is not sure he can give me another chance and I feel I have no support from my family as they are very traditional and would never ever accept what I have done.

Am struggling with how to live one day at a time after having a full time job for 15years and do not want to leave the house (especially without my husband)

12 Replies 12

Paul
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hey Persistence - Hugs. Welcome to Beyond Blue forums.

Bit of a sticky situation 😞

Have you worked out what led you to stray in the first place?

Have you thought about visiting a counsellor with your husband? Maybe that will help with a fresh start. The fresh start might then lead to feeling a bit better about leaving work.

Paul

persistence
Community Member

Thank you Paul

counselling has helped me to appreciate my marriage a lot more hence why I had been trying to get away from the other guy.My husband is a very proud man and refuses counselling at the moment.

trying very hard to appreciate my time at home and attempting to embrace my new circumstances.

hoping my husband will stay with me.

Paul
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hi Persistence,

Nice to hear back from you. Sounds like you are doing everything you can to put things back on track. How do you feel things are going with it?

 Paul

persistence
Community Member

Paul

honestly,I'm not quite sure.

I am trying to be a housewife which is something new to me.Is staying home cooking meals for him enough to win back his "trust"?

we seem to be getting on but not enough for him to lay next to me in bed.

still very unsure.

Paul
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hey Persistence,

If the tables were turned, how would he win back your trust?

Paul

persistence
Community Member

I really don't know what I would do..all I know is that I wouldn't let 10years of marriage go that easy..I've learnt that the hard way.

so we just had another blow up and more disappointed colleagues and manager about the way I left work.

there has not been one day in the last 2weeks where my heart is not breaking!!

whats next???

Paul
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hey Persistence,

What was the blowup about?

 

P

persistence
Community Member

The normal..not sure if he can trust me again..people blaming him for me leaving work..

not sure how much more I can take!!

Paul
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hey persistence,

Sorry to hear that things are getting tough 😞 

What do you think your husband needs to be able to trust you again?

 

Paul