After 3 rounds of IUI using a donor I decided ill try dating again thought that maybe theres potential ill find "the one" this time.
Started talking to a few guys but one always stood out. Got his number, started ttexting.2 weeks ago we met up. We clicked instantly.
The next night we went for a movie and a latenight drive to the city. We couldnt stop talking, ive never clicked with someone so soon.
I had himnat mine of Tuesday for dinner. Wednesday night he stayed the night at my place. Yes we have slept together a couple times now.
He came out of a 11 year relationship few months ago. Hes still married and has 2 daughters. Im told the reason for their split was because she fell out of love. She told him that twice over 8 months, she said she wanted a break but he said theres no breaks in a marriage. Its either theyre together or they divorce and they both agreed to divorce. Hes now living with his parents and had his two girls every second weekend.
Wednesday before he came to my place he needed to go to their old home so they can sort out whos getting what. They had an argument and I was bought up in the converstation but not by name. She stormed out yelling "i hope she makes you happy".
When he got to my place i knew something was off. I knew his mind was going a million miles per hour. I could just tell.
Thursday afternoon i get a message saying that we need to slow things down, that hes not ready for a relationship, that hes feeling confused and needs to collect his thoughts.
I went into meltdown mode. I havent been able to eat since lunch Thursday, crying when someone asks if im ok. I reassured him that i went into that first date with absolutely no plan of a relationship.
Things were just so perfect, natural, comfortable between the us so quickly and its scared the hell out of us. I completely understand where hes coming from and his situation but i cant help but feel distraught at the possibility i might lose someone who seemed so right. Hes told me everything hes said to me has been 100% genuine. Ive been in relationships and on dates and ive never felt this strong of a connection with someone before. I struggle to believe that soulmates are real but with him i was starting to believe it. One comment he made on the Wednesday night was "ive met the right person at the wrong time" and that if only he met me a few years ago before he married. And thats ruined me. Im scared to lose him.
