Hi Sar667
Completely understandable you'd be feeling this way. Personally, I'd feel the same way. If my husband and I had a break, he met someone, came back to me, returned to them and then finally came back to me, I'd call that 'Him picking and choosing what he wanted whenever it suited him'. If I said to him 'Give me an absolute guarantee you'd never return to her. How would you give me that guarantee?', I'd like to think he'd say 'With her completely out of the picture, that would guarantee I'd never see her or communicate with her'. Makes sense, in my opinion. Another thing to consider would be if he could not feel for me and how I'd be feeling her as being a temptation hanging around, that would mean he's simply feeling for himself and what he wants and/or what she wants. Hope that makes sense. In developing a new kind of relationship together, one that requires a guarantee of trust and a greater level of consciousness, evolving without that other person in the picture would be a part of that.
I think, to get past something or to get over something requires an understanding of what exactly it is that we're trying to get past or over. Do we actually want to get past or get over another person's continuing dismissive or self serving nature that causes us heartbreak, for example, or do we want to leave those kinds of depressing hurdles behind us? I feel for you so much as you face what you shouldn't have to be facing, while doing it all without your partner's full understanding and ability to feel deeply for you. ❤️
