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Marriage Crisis - Mental Breakdown

Community Member

I have been with my husband for 25 years. He cheated on me 4 years ago with a random man while he was drunk and I left him. We have since reconciled after his determined efforts to make it up to me, and we have been quite ok since.

A few weeks ago I discovered he had a 3 day affair with a woman at work. This was the biggest shock of my life and I have been a nervous wreck ever since. My eyes/face won't stop twitching, I feel pins and needles everywhere, I can barely eat, I feel suspicious and paranoid and have had bouts of extreme grief where I am crying and cannot even stand for hours on end.

He says he has ended it and feels very guilty, but he might move out next month to give himself 'time' to sort his head out, and so we can work though our issues. He is willing to go to couples therapy, but we cannot get in to see a psychologist until April, where else can we seek urgent help to save our marriage?

I have to go back to work in 1 week, but know I cannot cope if I am a wreck like this. I thought I was stronger than this, but just cannot get the physical symptoms under control, all the twitching and shaking, nor do I know what to do about my husband. I feel in despair and don't know where to turn. We also have 3 children.

2 Replies 2

Community Champion
Community Champion

Hi KKPop,

I'm so sorry you haven't had a reply, but welcome to the forums!

I'm sorry to hear about your marriage crisis. It sounds really terrifying to think about what might happen to your marriage and family.

I do not know much about relationship services in your area, but have you tried looking up Relationships Australia? It might be easier to give them a call and have a chat to them about what options you have.

Otherwise, it might also be helpful to see a GP or counsellor to talk about your own physical symptoms. It sounds like it's really impairing your day to day life, and I hope you can get some help with that even just on an individual level.


Community Member
Hi KKpop, You poor thing! Have you tried Lifeline to talk to someone? They can be great if you can’t get into a psych for awhile. I just wanted to make that suggestion- they are there 24/7 so might help a little to talk to them? At least you may be able to express your emotions & be heard or maybe try another online counselling option? I am so sorry that I have no other advice but would encourage you to you to reach out to a crisis support line if that is possible. Good on you for posting here! You sound like a strong caring person.