I felt stressed and just so upset my partner doesn't ask about my day?!

Jessksch
Community Member

So I know my fiance is kind, is very loyal and honest towards me and respects and treats me as an equal.

 

However, today I was going through a very stressed out situation and when I came home he just talked about his work and not once asked how I was. When I do talk about my day, he stays quiet and changes the topic and doesn't engage with me.

 

I have talked to him how this bothers me, he always talks about his day, never about how I'm feeling, how are things going for me? Etc... When I talk about my day, he either changes the topic or, he talks about how much worse he has it than me.

 

We get along amazingly otherwise, but he's also not physically affectionate in any way but I can go without it really.

 

We are planning a future together and have been together for over 10 years, it just has gotten worse and worse as he's going through a stressful period (I try to cheer him up all the time, ask about his day, he vents to me every day on his way home about his work, I buy him snacks, settle things he can't while he's at work etc...)...

 

When he got home today I didn't talk much and he seemed a bit annoyed, but I just couldn't deal with talking to someone who deosn't care to listen to me.

 

The problem is, nobody ever does, and I engage with people, ask questions about their day, how something made them feel etc...so I am always the one people come to to vent, but when I want to talk about something, nobody wants to listen.

 

I just want him to realize on his own that this doesn't make me want to talk to him. I told him thousands of times already and I kind of checked out, but still think it's rude of me to just be mean and not ask about his day.

 

I can really use advice, because we have been through so much together and this is just something little that has been gnawing at me so much

1 Reply 1

quirkywords
Community Champion
Community Champion

Jess

I can relate to your post


 I do and this may not work for you but what I do is because it was getting me upset so what I do after he’s told me about his day I say would you like to hear about my day and usually says yes and then I tell him about my day I think waiting for him to ask me won’t happen