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Feedback from dads

TetherEnd
Community Member

Hi everyone..

i just wanted some feedback from other dads, my daughter is in a beautiful age at the moment, just under 2. However she doesn't like me.. she loves her mum and doesn't want me AT ALL. She likes hanging out with her grandparents more than me.

Its been (varying degree) going on for nearly a year. I've been strong but I no longer think that's normal.

I more hands on than many of my other friends, but I sit n watch while their kids lovingly dotes on their dads while my daughter is often indifferent at best. She does tell me without prodding that she loves me once a awhile but very rare. I spend time with her, take her to park, been the for primary bath since birth. I love her, but I'm a nobody.

i believe it's partially because of the difference in parenting between my wife and I.. she's very care free happy go lucky won't raise her voice, where as I believe in discipline and calling her out when something's not right. We've talked about it many times but inherently I don't think she'll ever be able to support me.

im always told, this is a phase and short term, she'll grow out of it. I feel like a year is too long! Any feedback or previous exp from dads or mums?

2 Replies 2

geoff
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni
hi TetherEnd, I know how upsetting this can be because it happened to me with two beautiful grand daughters, the reason is because I have a moustache, it's not so much the look, but they say it tickles them and don't like it.
Young children go through this phase, it also happened with my son when these girls were born and started to crawl then walk, they favoured their mum, they were both breast feed, so he had to bide his time, it doesn't mean she doesn't loves you, certainly not.
Don't feel left out and please trust me, your time will come where it will be reversed, so the love be joined between you and your wife. Geoff.

topsy_
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hello TetherEnd

In my experience as a mother & a grandmother, this does really sound like a phase - I'm sorry to say! I've just recently watched my youngest grandchild react in the same manner.

The good news is all stages/phases come to an end. The bad news is before you know it there'll be a new phase for you to negotiate.

I was thinking perhaps if you were able to do some fun activities with your daughter on a regular basis it might help to soften the disciplinarian side of you. Maybe reading to her at night; singing songs; craft activities; going to the park/movies/ice cream shop together- the list is endless. But something that you feel particularly comfortable doing with her.

If you are stumped for ideas, my daughter always tells me -"google it mum"!

I'm sure everything will turn out fine. Good luck, Lyn.