You too , l was out of a 20yrs marriage, took 3 or 4yrs to myself then met someone then someone else but that's looking iffy atm with dramas she has ongoing. Soooo, here l am thinking about all this stuff again too. l feel like l'm being dis loyal to my gf that was but we're on an indefinite break now because of her legal stuff and she's been up home in a different state over 5mths now and with zero answers to any future , so l can't help but think.
Anyway , l was on a date site awhile myself back when. Low and behold straight out the gate l just happened to come across this girl over 4yrs ago now but l still think about her. Well l wasn't bc l've been involved but l am remembering her again now that this has happened .
lt was such a beautiful weird thing with her and maybe the big mistake l'd made l'll never know now l don't suppose but l even rejoined that site to see if she was around again , never know. Anyway l contacted her back then bc of not only her look and the deep soul l could see all over her but also all over everything she'd written on her page. She answered a few days later and we just sprang straight into this intensity l could never explain but it was like we were already two old souls or something just straight off the bat but we hadn't even met , without going into things talked about but the intensity was just surreal.
Over the next few days l re read her page many times and kept looking at her photos, l put it all onto my pc. l just couldn't believe the intensity l'd get reading her words , our messages, or from her eyes and pics.She was everything , my dream girl. But there was something wrong.
lt may well have been the mistake of my life , l'll never know , but l stopped everything right there and we didn't meet , because of that something, and that hurt her a lot l could see it. But l dunno you become so guarded and so trying to be pre'preventative.
The worst thing is nearly 5yrs later l still don't know if l did the right thing. Wouldn't you give anything to just go back sometimes.
rx
