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Children and grandchildren moving to another country

Kittos
Community Member
My only child and his wife and children have moved to the other side of the world. They moved two years ago. I continue to grieve for them. 
5 Replies 5

Neil_1
Community Member

Hi there kittos

 

Thank you for coming here and providing your post and also I’d like to welcome you to Beyond Blue.

 

I’m gathering that you’ve been in a pretty sad and low place for quite a while now.   That is quite the move to up and leave and to be now located on the other side of the world – is it due to a work posting and is there any opportunity of them coming back after a set amount of time?

 

I’m not too sure about technology myself, but is there any way of being able to communicate with them, “on-line” kind of thing – through skype?

 

In your location where you live, do you have a group that you belong too and have a kind of network of friends who you can visit, see or just simply chat with?

 

I would love to hear back from you.

 

Kind regards

 

Neil

Kittos
Community Member

Hi Neil

Thank you for your response and interest. It is highly unlikely that my son and his family will return to Australia. He has a lovely wife but she is from another country and they have moved there for that reason. The children are bilingual and will grow up in their mother's country.

Yes technology helps. Skyping allows me to see them and keep up to date with them. Before they moved they lived in the same suburb as me and I spent a lot of time with the children. Whilst skype is good it is not the same as physical contact

 Makes me appreciate how hard it must have been for parents in the past when their children emigrated and contact was poor. It must have been common for those families to be very disconnected. Like a death. Even with the help of Skype and opportunities to visit them it is still like a death. Maybe that's hard to appreciate if you have not experienced it

 I do have good friends and contacts

 Thank you for your interest

Kittos

geoff
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

dear Kitto, I appreciate your lack of physical contact with the children, as my two little grand daughters live two and a half hours away from me, but I haven't seen them since xmas because I've had surgery, and the eldest grand daughter who is only 3 tries to show me what she has drawn on her Dad's phone, but I can't see it.

Talking does lack the feeling of giving them a hug and a kiss, so it must be so hard for you.

Are you able to save up some money and go over and see them all. L Geoff. x

 

Tessa21
Community Member

Hi Kitto, my children live ony 1 to 2 hours away but since I became ill I hardly see them as they are too bust with their own lives. If I have seen my granddaughter 10 times in 10 years I am lucky. I can feel for you as it makes me sad too, but we phone on a regular basis. Today in the digital age you can be close to your loved ones on a touch of a button, providing they participate. One can see each other practically face to face on the computer screen. I know it's not the same, as we still have a lot to give and missing out on giving it. My daughter once said that birds live their own life as soon as they can fly, sadly we are no birds. Coming here and talking to someone is a good start to find new things to do. Just to be able to talk with someone who understands what we are going through would help.

I am new here and have not quite worked out how to do things, I hope I will find people here to share thoughts with; people who understand.

All the best for you, Tessa

Tea_girl
Community Member

Hi Kittos

What a terrible sadness you must feel. I can imagine the heartbreak as a mother. I hope you start to feel more at peace, but it would be so difficult if not impossible. Becoming a parent is a hard thing but by far the worst thing is the passing of time when you are no longer needed the way you were when they were born. Very hard . I wish you the very best and hope you are able to visit them. Skype is not quite the same for sure even though it is better than a phone conversation.