My 2nd thread and hope to get some advice. My daughter turning 17 in a month has major depression is on medication and seeing a pyscologist. My issue atm is with her boyfriends influence and her rudeness. I like the boyfriend who suffers from depression also as they understand each other BUT I'm scared that she relys on him so so much. My DR said let him stay as she got something that makes her happy and stopping suicide thoughts. He has basically moved in. What I'm having a issue with is she listens to only him. He is saying pyscologists aren't helpful didn't help him. I got cranky and said she is staying with hers and you aren't a DR..I NEVER get 2 mins of her time they r joined at the hip. I do remember what young love is like but her rudeness and anger is always directed at her family only.. i have tried talking to her but she yells and says i hate him etc. I try to advise her don't lose your friends they r important. I'm on eggshells as is my mum and sister as we don't know when she will explode. Any advice appreciated thanks.
Yes there was so much I didn't agree with, but it was them who were establishing their own life, this maybe hard, but they have to learn to do this by themselves, because the time comes when we can't handle them with rubber gloves, that's no way for them to learn.
I know how upset you are, and I don't blame you one bit, that's how I felt, and the same happened with my wife (ex), but as soon as they make a mistake that's when they she will come back to you.
You can't say how long this r/ship is going to last and if I am right she has said ' she yells and says i hate him etc', so b/g/friends come and go as she grows older, and unless he is doing anything that is illegal then he has his own opinion, just as you do, they may not agree, but who's to know that down the track he will want to see a psychologist himself, let your daughter be happy and I've only learnt this in hindsight. Geoff.
Hi there mum I have two teenagers one of each. Little miss is 18 and still listens to me, Mr knowit all is just that and will buck any advice given to him. I have found to be there for them advise them say don't go there/ do this and the reasons why and where fors. Then let them work it out for themselves. Sooner or later they realize hey we better do it dads way. Because there is less drama in there lives if they comply to what is the right thing. I have been there just to pick up the pieces. Which is now getting less and less. They now know I am on there side. I have been through several girlfriends over the years they come and go. But family your stuck with. Your daughter will eventually get the realization that you are there for her. Then hopefully she will come running to your door and say sorry and have a really good cry on your freshly dry cleaned dress. But you will be there for her because sh is your baby daughter, and always will be.
Thanks yr reply has helped. It's her who yells at us not him. He has had 4 different pyscologists over the years he says none helped at all, well my daughters one is helping her. I will take yr advice. It is hard and sometimes i need clarity and a reminder that everyone is different.
Mum I am a singe parent I know those days.
the ones that the day is worse than the nightmare the night before you the one your think your still in but find out your awake.
Because its your child you give them a heap of room to move in but they will always push the boundaries it's there job to do that, And they do it so well. My job as a parent is to embarrass my kids with bad dad jokes and daddy dancing ( Which is just bad dancing)hey it's my job they have there job I have mine.
Hey mum, I just found your post and only read your first post.
Honestly stop fighting and arguing, all it does is exhaust you and get your daughters back up. It's the same old story the more you say the more they rebel.
You sound like a really good mum who is completely drained,
My advice is to back away, I know how hard that is ,if you want to know just ask but this is about you.
The only thing at this age for you to do,firstly don't be abused by them!
Calmly tell your daughter how you feel.
And that's all you can do
Start thinking about your life