Narrcistic abuse

[cat15]

Hello, I am a 52 year old woman, and have a life of narrcistic abuse from my mother, and exhusband. I always felt different and wondered why things never made sense and why things were always my fault and still my fault. I could never put my finger on what was wrong. I have now discovered that both my mother and my exhusband are narrccists. I read about narrcism and when I did it hit me like a brick, all the things they say and did and are still doing to me, finally had a name. I am trying to get help, but it seems people don't believe me, or take me seriously. Why didn't I see what was going on? I don't know how to get over this. My exhusband was abusing me mentally and at times physically, for over 30 years. This might sound trivial, but narrcistic abuse is real, and I have been left feeling, worthless, stupid and not good for anyone or anything. If anyone can offer advice I,would be greatful. I,wish you all well.

[Ggrand]

Hello Dear cat15,

I’m sorry that all happened to you and your struggling really hard right now, I was married for 38 years with a physically, mentally, controlling and sexually abusive husband, I probably still would be if he didn’t pass away….I didn’t have the courage to leave him through fear of retaliation from him….I’m really very proud of you for having that bravery….my parents and older brother was also narcissistic people…I though that life was like my life for everyone…I learnt about the word narcissist after I came onto these forums..I read about it and it opened my eyes and mind…about narcissistic people….

Narcissistic abuse, isn’t trivial at all…It’s a terrible and horrible thing to survive, we’re made to feel worthless, useless, a waste of space, loose all our confidence, self respect in ourselves and fear just about anyone….

I struggled for years with myself and what I had become,  from the people who should have loved me…even attempted to end my life a few times….I ended up reaching out to my Dr..who organised professional help with my CPTSD which was caused from all the abuse I survived…which along with these forums helped me to understand how I could best manage any triggers when they pop their ugly images, thoughts into my head…Can I gently urge you sweet cat to please if you haven’t as yet…to make an appointment with you Dr and talk honestly about what you’re going through….

We are survivors cat, you, me and many more people…We are not worthless, stupid, nor are we not good for anyone or anything else…We are worthy, useful and are good enough for everyone, everything and the the world…

Please, talk here when you feel up to it sweet cat..

Thinking of you with kindness and care, sending you a gentle, warm caring hug 🤗.

Grandy..

[cat15]

Thank,you G grand for your kind words. It is a small comfort to know that I am not alone, and someone understands. Trying to explain it to,people seems pointless as it's sounds trivial. The damage that these people do is real. I could tell you things which are unbelievable, that don't make sense, it never did, but now we are  no longer together, and he is gone, a kind of clarity has come to my head, and looking back, I now realise how controlling and manipulative he is. My mother is the same, why didn't I see this thing going on right in front of me. I am waiting to see a physiologist, I have spoken to one before and I didn't even get to start to explain it to her. She just told me, to go for a walk and breath. I'm so sorry for what you went through, and managed to get help. Thank you for your kind words, it's means a lot, that someone understands and knows that this is real abuse. I hope you have a happy day and life, thank you, Cat.