This bipolar life

[Kazzl]

Are your moods are like an elevator with no control buttons? Mine are.

Ground floor ... I feel normal, content, just quietly getting on with ordinary, everyday life, loving my family and friends. This is as it should be. And maybe there's nothing wrong with me after all. Live.

Going up, top floor. Oh look! There's a shiny thing! I want to sing! Let's go buy stuff! Let's have a big party and invite the world! What could possibly go wrong! Woooooo hoooooooo! Play.

Going up (a different day) top floor. What do you mean you don't agree with me! I'm right! Why don't you think like me? Keep up! How can you be so illogical? I'll f-ing shred you if you don't do what I want! Rage.

Going down, lower ground floor. Flat, listless, can't be bothered. Can still function but it's a drag. Cope

Going down, basement. I'm never getting out of bed again. I'm useless, worthless. Total idiot, how could I ever imagine I could do anything, nothing ever goes right because I'm wrong. I'm a burden to everyone. Hide.

Welcome to my bipolar world. It's always been my world, but it's only recently I've seen it for what it is. About 15 years ago I was diagnosed with clinical depression during one of my 'basement' times. I had a lot of lower ground floor times too, on and off, and I kept out of the basement (so I thought) with alcohol. Until that took me into the blackest ever basement with only one obvious way out. Having survived doing something very dangerous I realised I had to stop drinking or I really would die.

I never took much notice of the playful times or the anger, that was just me, I was fun sometimes, and sometimes I was a devastating bitch. Ha! Deal with it people!

Well, yes, but in time the elevator started going up and down too quickly and, as I became more aware and more knowledgeable about mental health I realised this wasn't good. Doctor. Diagnosis. Bipolar 2. Lithium.

So, I've started this thread in the hope that other bipolar folks will join me, to share experiences and strategies. In my 'beginners' understanding, we are different from other fellow travellers of the back dog. While we experience depression as many others on this site do, the hypomanic or manic ups and, for some the rapid cycling that can happen, are experiences unto themselves.

I want to learn more, and I want to share with others. I hope my fellow elevators will join me here.
BTW, it's a ground floor day in my head today! Yay!

Love

Kaz

[Airies]

Hi folks, Gotta watch out for predictive texts. I like many get caught out.My wife has an explanation for my crappy sleep. Recorded me during sleep, appears I might have sleep apnea. Explains a lot. Tired during the day. Drs appointment coming. Loosing more weight would help. Funny thing is I've been heavier and ok. Another cat in the trap last night, a different one. My front yard appears to be the local Cattery. Responsable pet ownership isn't to much to ask. Anyway far bigger issues to be had by all. Have a good one folks. Hope you are on the road to recovery Velvet

cheers

[velvetfaerie]

I will catch up on the posts soon. I'm very tired.
I was there for the most part of 2 days being cancelled a couple of times due to life or death surgeries. Which is fair enough. I was also nil by mouth for that time and no drip. So 30 odd hours into this I broke down. I was weak... tired... not in pain believe it or not... And wanted to know what the drama was. They explained and I'm cool. Thars cool. Then finally the Dr put me on a drip. The same Dr who was over seeing me since I got there.. And... He was rather attractive, funny, dark humour. My surgery neighbour in there was excellent. Nice chick. Has a world of serious medical issues but is thriving. She is also ex forensics cop. We are friends now. The nurses checked on us whenever we went quiet LOL!!!

I better rest. So tired and probably still affected by the medication.

[quirkywords]

Thanks velvet for letting us know how you are.
Glad you made a friend.
Please rest .Is man thing coming over with some tlc

Tale care .

[velvetfaerie]

Man thing lives here and is trying to stop me vacuuming Hahahahaha

[quirkywords]

Velvet
Why are you even thinking my idea of vacuuming after what you have been through.

I would hide vacuum cleaner way so you couldn't use it and the mop and the toilet brush and the dustpan and broom.

[Airies]

Velvet, great news that you're on the road to recovery.Sounds like you had the nurses running amuck. I'm sure you will be up and running in due course and not a minute before. Man thing can do the vacuuming and other cleaning. It's a team effort.Id put you in shackles to stop you overdoing it. Take care, be kind to yourself and great to see you back,

cheers

[Issi]

Hello everyone

I know it’s been a couple of weeks, but I got a job (a shitty one) working in a call centre re COVID19. Working from home, it’s so isolating as I’m in my bedroom as hubby is in the office, uni kid in his room, high school kid in his room and living room/kitchen I can’t use as we all seam to have breaks at different times.

The Cats won last night and the Storm won Thursday night.

V I hope you are feeling a bit better today

Issi

[velvetfaerie]

Heheheheheh people prob want to shackle me down.
I am trucking along ok. Just tender and tired.

Yay for a job Issi!!! Not an ideal one but it's better than nothing?

I enjoyed some sunshine this am after the nurse visit. I am about to go enjoy sushi 😄

[asdff]

Velvet that is funny that you made friends in surgery. That is something I would do! Glad you are resting and semi okay now. Not cool about the wait time though.

Yay for the job Issi. Would it make you feel better if you were doing something face to face or working in a group setting? I know it's not possible at this time.

[quirkywords]

Issi

if you I could stay in bed all day in my pyjamas and make money. I would like that.

Seriously, it is a pain that you get the room no one is using. Do you get taught what to say to people or do you have sheets to read from.

Velvet yay to sushi and sunshine.

Any tips on coping with a partner who hates it when you disagree and does not respect we can have different views. gets me down at times.