Can’t pull it together

[ChristieJ]

I’m finding things especially hard this year. I’m supporting my fiancé after the last 3 mental breakdowns with 2 hospitalisations within the last year. I am feeling so low that I’m running on empty. I spend the little hours I have when I’m not working finding ways to help and support my partner. Most research tells me that I need to look after myself however it’s easy to say this when you aren’t constantly worrying. My partner has been constantly mentally unwell for over a year now and have no peace. He is my soulmate, I will not walk away because I love and cherish him. I understand he is not well causing his constant I’ll state of mind and downward spiral. Im doing all I can to keep him alive or medication, healthy diet. He has tried ECT numerous phycotherapy, recently a failed drug trial which sent him into psychosis.. got worse from there. He doesn’t take alcohol or illegal substances and never has. Why him?!

My dads death anniversary is New Year’s Eve. This time of year cuts me deeply and feel so sad and low, hurts that I can’t just be sad around him. I know he can’t take it when I am low. What can I do besides hold it in?

[Hang10]

Hi Christie J.

Big warm welcome to Beyond Blue, a place of lovely people who care and understands in a tough world that we live in.

First up I like to say how wonderful your love for your husband is. It beautiful to see the care and love you have for him. I shore that he can feel all the love when he not well and also in times he is.

Friends on here may be able to write up more information to get help for you in your time of need. To help fill your big heart to allow you to continue pouring the help your husband needs.

I hope that things get better for him. Warm wishes to you and your family this Christmas.

Keep believing.

Hang10.