Work issues, need some advice

[Alice850]

I’ve been in this job for about three months now. I’ve just had my three month review and the feedback was good except for when it comes to me being more reserved, my manager said that I’m quiet and reserved and sometimes just come in and say hello to everyone do my job and go home. There has been some issues over the past few months where I’ve been left out of some things at work or have felt like I’m not really made to feel part of the team. This review meeting was only last week so since then I’ve really tried to engage a lot more and join conversations throughout the day, not that I didn’t do that before, but obviously that was some feedback that I need to be doing more of that so that’s what I’ve done. I’ve now been told today that I no longer report to that manager and I now report to my colleague, who’s now my manager. She’s 20 and doesn’t have any experience. I’m 31 for context and have over eight years of experience in this industry. I had a meeting with her today and she has now got me reporting every afternoon and telling her every single thing that I’ve done throughout the day and what my priorities are for tomorrow. We also have a leadership development program where I work. It’s only just been run for the first time. They’ve now selected the group of people that are going to do it next year. I’m not one of them and one person who has been selected has been there for less time than I’ve been working there and another person has literally only been there for two days. I really don’t know what else I can do. Even before this colleague became my manager today I had a chat with her last week to ask what I could do differently or how I could engage more in the workplace. Not that I don’t already do that. I do engage in things, but I asked her what could I do differently to be shown to be taking initiative? She gave some feedback and I’ve been doing that. I really don’t know what else to do. I’m looking for other work but there are no jobs in this area at the moment. I guess I just would like some advice from people who have gone through something similar or have any advice on what I should do because it’s really starting to affect my mood, I feel really depressed and it’s starting to affect my personal life outside of work.

[white knight]

Hi, welcome

Thankyou for you detailed post.

I'm retired and had 90 or so jobs due to mania, so when I used to get upset I'd leave and get another job, due to bipolar. Among that I had 15 professions. One job was prison officer where I undertook 6 months full time training. I was taught well, the proper supervisory techniques otherwise I'd put myself in danger.

So of those 95 jobs, how many managers/supervisors were professional, fair, reasonable, listened and stopped any unjust actions to protect me? I's say 2. 2 out of 90. It highlighted to me how hard it was to work under some supervisors.

So, my advice based on my lived experience? To have  short, medium and long range goals to overcome these possibly ongoing problems in the workplace.

Short goals- Seek another job which might take a while. In the meantime do as asked and accept that with this management group for whatever reason they dont like quiet workers, they prefer dynamic outgoing types. That's their choice but it is also a reflection of not accepting your personality and thats on them not you. However, I'm certain that you would be appreciated much more if you contributed towards that business in your own way- perhaps you can think of a way for the company to do things more efficient. eg say the company orders boxes in advance in bulk and takes up a lot of space. You might advise them of ordering by need thereby freeing up space so the company can produce more finished product and make more profit. Quiet people are often thinkers. You can prove that quiet people can be valuable. Also see your GP for a check up and mention your depression.

Medium goals- This can include night education classes, change of career, motivation lectures for positivity, mental illness management and so on

Long term goals- At about 30yo I set my aspirations on being my own boss. That meant finding a profession that had limited contact with other people and my success depended upon my own work ethic and efficiency. At 40yo after training etc I successfully started my own business and stayed in that field until early forced retirement at 57yo. Let's say it was in the security field.

There are many workplaces that are toxic for whatever reason. Or challenging as in your case. It can be a culture created by management. You havent been encouraged by the sounds of it nor praised for the good things you do. I suspect you wont be able to make much of an impression unless you do it your way but the most important thing is- when you go for interviews that you will leave this current job with a recommendation. 

Good luck

TonyWK