Work anxiety probably due to work history.

[Slaugh]

Hello,

Having a rough time mentally at the moment.

work is sucking my motivation. It's not so much that the job I have now is bad but from past experiences with other jobs it triggers my depressive episodes.

Right now I'm in my 5th year of a 4 year electrical apprenticeship with my third employer. The reasoning for such a long stint is due to redundancies and abuse of power (IMO). I have lost my motivation. My grades in school are declining and the roadmap for completion, although only a few months, seems long difficult and somewhat questionable.

It began with a redundency and then the following employer pulling me out of school for over 6 months under the threat of losing my job. However I re-enrolled after repeated requests to go back to school which I was subsequently fired over. Went down the avenues of fair work but it just seemed like too much hassel.

I continued to go to school to finish the year knowing I was six months behind. Finished the semester and after the Chrissy break I went to enrol again. Problem was I was unemployed so I couldn't re-enrol. What's worse is the previous semester didnt count as it was a two part module. So I would have to restart the module again. Another 6 months added and an additional $700.

Managed to find an employer again but had to wait an additional 3 months before I could even start the full year I was behind on.

so here I am now. Possibly less than 3 months from completion before I can sit my final exams and I am at breaking point. Another annoying thing is I believe the TAFE haven't included a module in my roadmap. A module which will take and additional few months to complete.

Even when I finish the course work there's still 6 more months just prepping for the final exams. All this added time whilst earning minimum wage has just destroyed me.

I have been struck down with pnemonia and have been off work for a week. I need to take more time off but I don't believe Ill have a job if I do. But to tell you the truth, I almost don't really care. I'm just so fed up. This apprentiship just doesn't seem to end despite the effort. So now it's not so much employment that is screwing me its the TAFE. My current boss seems like a good bloke but I just can't trust him.

All this with a family to support is becoming too much. My parents are well off so financially we are pretty secure, it is more an issue of relying on others which is shameful and embarrassing.

Not the full history but as relevant as can be.

[Just Sara]

Hi and welcome Slaugh;

I'm assuming you're in you 20's as you have a family to support. Minimum wage and having a short but dicey history as an apprentice is hard slog. My son who's now in his mid 20's has gone down a similar path to you, so I get it.

Do you have a mentor? They're great for advice and knowing how to navigate the system when problems occur. Tafe also have counsellors that support planning and issues that affect emotions and in your case, apathy and fear.

The thing with getting qualifications, is all about patience and doing whatever it takes to come out the other side with that all-important piece of paper with your name on it. Use services like the Apprenticeship Board to back you up with problems you face with employers. They have very strict rules.

The best advice I can afford you, is to have a 5 yr plan so you have an idea of where you want to be in that time, and what to do to get there. An action plan is personal and can change from time to time, but the outcome is in your favour. A counsellor can help with creating one.

You need to find 'staying power' until your qual's are finished. Thru thick and thin, it's all about finishing. As your folks are supporting your financial situation, this issue of apathy and impatience is what needs addressing.

Counsellors can help, but it's you who needs to access them. Tafe's a good start because they're well informed and experienced with apprentice issues. Is there positive dialog between you and your partner? I hope so because it makes all the difference.

I'm well into my 50's so what I speak from is 'hindsight'; knowing what would've worked if I had my time over again. The main thing for me was not having confidence in myself and no mentor to help me. My communication skills weren't the best either, so I winged it until I was older and began my studies later in life. (mid 30's)

6 months out of your life is a drop in the ocean I can confidently say, so learning how to get thru each day one at a time is what it takes.

I'm really glad you dropped by and look forward to hearing from you again. Beside your history, it'd be nice to know what's on the horizon for your future and where you'd like to be.

I'm sorry to hear your health has taken a toll, it doesn't help when this happens.

So please come back and hopefully we can encourage you to continue in a better state of mind and finish what you've started.

My best...

Sez

[Slaugh]

Thank you very much for your reply Sez.

im actually 32, been married for almost 6 years have a 2 and a half year old and a new baby boy due in a couple of weeks.

so I'm on the older end of my youth but still realise I'm still young. I do not regret any decisionI have made when it comes to my family. My career on the other hand just makes me feel like a constant failure.

i have called in sick to work tomorrow for two reasons. I still have traces of pnemonia which I'm trying to shake but the main reason is I am terrified at the thought of going.

i am attempting to have the TAFE clarify what needs to be done to complete the apprenticeship and I am hoping I do not have to be employed to finish, that way I can focus on the study without anxiety of a 10 hour 5 days a week.

[Just Sara]

Morning S;

32 eh? Well, I feel a bit silly then. (smiling) Having a toddler and a new baby boy on the way is a wonderful time for you indeed. I'm sorry it's marred by your issues at work.

As an electrician, I'd imagine there's plenty of work out there and other employment opportunities. It's the hands-on stuff that teaches more than study. Though I do understand your need to get away and recuperate.

There's nothing worse than dreading work I must say; I'm medically retired from a long career in Govt Sector after being bullied for many yrs. So I do get your apprehension.

I stayed until I broke, so I don't want to see anyone else go thru this. As I suggested before, there are counsellors at Tafe who you can vent to and hopefully help ease your mind. Do you see a psychologist? Maybe your GP can refer you.

I'm also thinking there may be help thru your apprenticeship authority. They must see this stuff happening all the time.

I wish I had the right words and advice to help you at this time, it's frustrating to 'watch' people in confusion and dread.

You know you can write here anytime. It might even be good therapy to tell me what's occurring in your workplace. I'm all ears. 🙂

I hope your lungs are on the mend because it's harder to face work when you're unwell.

Anyway, I'm off to do the doing. Hope you find a way out of this stuff more sooner than later.

My best...

Sez