What do I do, where do I go from here?

[Unsureperson98]

Hi everyone, new to posting here still but I wanted to reach back out again. 

I am so stuck and unsure of my life right now. I've always had depression and bad anxiety throughout my life (I'm 27 now) but at the moment it's really affecting me the most. I'm in so much pain and unhappiness. I feel sick most of the time, unable to keep food down or feel hungry. I'm throwing up after eating half a meal and can't stomach anything else. I have this constant pain in my chest and nausea in my stomach.I get terrible sleep and can barely keep energy. I've also recently started feeling unhappy in my 7 year relationship. It feels like things have shifted and we arent connected anymore. I'm constantly thinking about where I stand and how my partner feels about me, that he will leave. My needs feel no longer met. We've talked about this and he has assured me it's not how he feels, that everything seems fine as always. I don't feel this in my gut though. I don't know if this is throwing me further into a spiral or if I am just freaking out for nothing. I have no energy and feel so sick that I've been calling out of work because I just don't have the energy or wellbeing to be there and do my job properly. 

I've started going to a psychologist and am looking forward to that assistance but I just can't beat this excruciating pain I feel all the time. How can I work past it and feel some comfort again? I don't know where to start or what I can do. I just don't want to keep feeling a painful feeling in my chest anymore. I wish I could turn a switch off in my head and it make me feel no more pain. I'm trying so many grounding techniques (walking, deep breaths, sitting in the pain, etc) but nothing helps.

Any help? 

[TrueSeeker]

Hello

I'm so sorry that you feel like that. I can understand how anxiety can get better of us and take over. When that happens, we start worrying about a lot of things and it all seems too much.

I can see that you're worrying about your future with your partner a lot. I understand that anything can happen in the future and it can be upsetting. We sometimes forget that good things can happen too and that everything might be ok, we don't know as it's really hard to predict future.

Maybe trying to focus on the present might help. At this moments everything is fine with your partner and that's all that matters. Trying to enjoy good things while they last could help you with your anxiety. It might take some time to learn how to focus on good things but I think it's worth the effort. It does need reminding ourselves a lot but once we create a habit of thinking like that, it will become automatic and we'll be doing it without even knowing. It does take persistence and patience.

I hope that things will get better for you, please be nice to yourself and let us know how you're going whenever you feel like it