Hello. That's me. Empty, a mere insignificant dot. I hold no value, I have no purpose, just slowly self destructing. Estranged from my siblings and at the mercy of gossip. My mother is a dependent elderly. She dotes on my two elder siblings and not only trusts but relies on them to do everything for her. Over the years, my offer to help Mum, is met with her scoff, distain and refusal. Always stating that my siblings will do it! I eventually wrote my siblings stating my situation and why I've been unable to help ease their burdens. That I will no longer offer, as it now comes across as pleading or begging to prove myself worthy. To this day, when others ask where I am and why I don't pull my weight, neither sibling will explain that I am continually rejected by our mother. My name is mud amongst both immediate and extended family. Tongues wag, but no one asks me what's going on. I've been judged and sentenced. I can no longer cope. I no longer have a voice. I am neither seen nor heard. Forgotten and ignored. My mother is very good at creating rifts and pitting one child against the other. I am very good at allowing myself to be the target. When I do stand up for myself, their shackles are raised and they're the victim and I am the nasty one. I am lonely, dead inside, and wondering why the heck am I still on this planet!!! Sorry to vent.
