Struggling with my mental health

x_BLUE_MOON_x

Hi, I'm an adult woman and I have autism, ocd, and adhd. I've had bad mental health for 1 year and 7 months now. It all started when I lowered my medication by tapering down slowly over a course of months. When I was on the lower dose I got a ocd thought and I got obsessed and then my mental health started deteriorating and spiralling and I hit rock bottom. Then I increased my dose slowly, my mental health has improved since going back. But ever since l've lowered my dose and then increased it, it doesn't feel as effective as it was before, and I don't know why.

Most of my obsessive thoughts are about my collectables (my figurines) and my (video games). Whether they are “perfect” or “not perfect” this has been going on for 8 years now.

Also, I'm getting treated for my ocd by an ocd trained psychologist, I’m doing exposure therapy and I’m seeing a psychiatrist.

My psychiatrist thinks my adhd is making my ocd worse, he thinks by treating both my ocd and that will help my mental health, but so far I notice no improvement. I've been doing a lot of things trying to get better, but I need more help. I don’t want to suffer anymore. Any advice would help thanks.

white knight

Hi Bluemoon, welcome

Just a brief mention- I'm 70yo, have bipolar but was originally diagnosed incorrectly with ADHD due to the similarities in mania. So I took the wrong meds for 6 years!. I have dysthymia and been told I am high functioning autistic recently which ticks all the boxes of my roller coaster life. I've embraced all my illnesses and they have given me the gifts like poetry and empathy that I'm proud of.

Like you I've lowered my bipolar meds to see if I really needed them or that dose, went into behavioural and emotional trouble and returned to the original doses. Unlike you it went back to their original effect. We are limited here as to talking medications because essentially we are lived experienced peer advisors. And in terms of professional medical consultations you are doing all the right things so congratulations there.

I think with your hobbies if your obsessions aren't hurting others then I cant see a problem. It's an avenue of allowing your obsessions to play out in your life. You at least have hobbies which really is great distraction from issues like society and challenges like finances and so on.

Your efforts in "doing lots of things trying to get better" is commendable but at some point acceptance is the better way to go- (the following threads you only need to read the first post of each. Some might not be directly applicable to your situation but I'm hoping they will stimulate your interest and we can chat further if you desire.

https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/staying-well/accepting-your-mental-illness/td-p/370973

https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/staying-well/acceptance-a-golden-goal/td-p/183383

https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/staying-well/acceptance-is-this-our-biggest-challenge/td-p/14769...

https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/staying-well/motivation-and-mental-illness/td-p/621421

TonyWK