Self Diagnosis

[Slippers]

This is a self-diagnosis. I work in a large corporate company and I had a fight with one of my team mates yesterday and it has left me stressed and asking myself whether any decisions I make are right or not; I had been invited to a get together for tonight and tomorrow night but I have cancelled as I don’t want to go after the fight with my team mate.
Maybe it’s me feeling sorry for myself, my intuition tells me to run away from bad things and I sit at home and I normally sleep for most of the weekend and I hate separating myself from the world when things go wrong. If I keep cancelling from fun things that I have been invited to then friends are going to stop inviting me to anything.
Maybe I am feeling sorry for myself and separating from everything is my way to ask for other people to care, similar to throwing my toys out of the pram.
I have a good feeling of self-worth; I am not going to be throwing my any heavy machinery 🙂

[quirkywords]

Welcome slippers to the forum. This is a friendly and supportive place.

I think having an argument at work that makes you doubt your decisions is stressful.

I can see why you want to cancel to avoid a possible fight and stress.

I think avoiding uncomfortable situations can work in the shirt term but cutting yourself from possible fun social outings is not helpful in the long term.

If you are asking for people to care, has it worked for you?

How do you feel you could communicate with the worker you had a an argument in a way that you both listen to each other with respect?

Thanks for writing this thread.

Quirky

[Doolhof]

Hi Slippers,

Thanks for sharing your issue and your thoughts about what might be behind your actions.

I'm wondering if their is a mediator at work? Do you have a complaints department or maybe a set way of dealing with disputes? Most places have a plan as to how to deal with conflict resolution.

When I feel stressed, depressed or anxious, it always seems easier to cancel activities and duties and take a step back. Sometimes that is necessary, but like you mentioned, if you do it too often, the opportunities to go out and be with people might reduce.

Can you select one event you have been invited to and try your hardest to attend no matter what. I find that if I generally push myself a little I get places.

This doesn't always work, giving it a go is beneficial. Accepting when it is not possible to do something can also be healthy.

Hope you are able to resolve the issue at work or let it go and find ways to be with friends and family.

Cheers to you from Dools