I feel so lost. I had big dreams. I don't know where they are. It's almost like I lost my zest. It's been a truly MASSIVE year from begging right until now. So many huge thing have happened. Im thinking about 2020. I have to move again asap in 2020. I'm closing down one business and starting another. I've changed so much in myself this year. I just don't know where to even begin. I know baby steps. I just don't know where to start. I'm having difficulty formulating a plan. I feel lost cause I have no beginning point. I have a flatmate that picks on me real bad to the point I no longer sleep in my room or am in the house during the day. I stay in the shed when I'm not home and slept in the shed last night just to get away from her. I just want to feel hope again. I'm feeling sad, lost and despondent. Just a heads up,please don't suggest therapy. I have other posts here talking about my journey with therapy. Thank you.
That responded to the the part about your flatmate, however I don't think you can separate that really huge problem from the rest of your life.
Would you consider that it it consumes so much of you at the moment that thinking of finding a starting point, and further ambitions is a bit unrealistic?
I suspect it is not therapy, but circumstances that will start to solve your problem with the future.
I agree that I can't seperate this huge problem from the rest of my life. Her disgusting treatment and abuse is definitely impacting other areas.
I can't move right now. In that I mean within the next week. It's impossible and if I did I would just be going somewhere worse as it is a rushed decision.
I rang 1800 respect today, talked to them. It was as I guessed. Not much help. The woman just kept saying remember your strengths when I was asking for strategies and ways to cope till I could move out. She didn't seem to comprehend my question. I told her it's been a huge year and I have no strength left, that's why I'm calling to get some help. Totally pointless hour wasted.
For now I'm mostly in the shed or I'm out. It's all I can do although it's posing many problems and stress for me.
I'm doing my best. Hate is a strong word. I do HATE everything about her charcoal soul though.
