I don't really know where to start. I've read some of the threads on the forum and I am blank- What am I meant to type here? Its actually quite difficult for me to even type this as I don't open up to people very well, but hey, no one on this site will actually know me or meet me in person. Well for anyone who is interested: I am 26 years old, came to Australia when I was 1. Lived in Sydney all my life. I would class my family in the upper middle class range with your typical hard working Asian parents who have always tried to provide tangible support rather than emotional. Maybe it's because I never actually reached out to them emotionally? Who knows right? After doing a considerable amount of contemplation in regards to where I am (my current situation) and how I became to be the way I am, I'm resigned to the fact that I am the only one to blame. I am absolutely numb to all emotions and my last recollection of when I was 'happy' would be at least 4 years ago. I want to feel some sort of emotion, anything really - May sound silly but I really just want to have a good cry. Tried and Failed. There has even been a time I have thought about ending my own life.As you can probably tell, I am quite numb - no real feelings of any kind at the moment. It has been 7 weeks of pure hell. I find it interesting that the human body is capable of dealing with this amount of stress. Back pain, neck pain, no sleep and no appetite - but it still keeps chugging along like Thomas the Tank Engine. Life is short. Can't really explain in any further detail than this. I guess I'm not ready to show and tell - not sure if I even could though. This is as best as I can 'release' at the moment, not even sure why I typed this? Haven't been able to show you if I'm depressed or anything - feeling like a sinking volcano.
