hi Brent, and welcome to the forum.
It doesn't matter what age anyone gets depression, it still feels horrible and takes away anything we used to like doing, can decrease our appetite, destroys our want to do any of the hobbies we once loved, and destroys any association we had with our close friends, and because of this I'm so sorry for you to have to go through all of this.
I know how you feel, and please believe me when I say this, because not only myself but all the people on this site have also gone through or perhaps still going through the same dreaded feeling that you are encountering.
It's not so much that you aren't interested in what anyone is saying to you, it's just that this illness takes away any desire to hear them, so you smile on cue, get sad on cue and just pretend to join in to how others are reacting, but deep down there is an awful feeling that makes you want to block out whatever that is said to you, this isn't any fault of yours and please never feel this way, but can at times be difficult to understand, but you never raised your hand to get any of this, it just comes along.
There is a way to finally get help and that's to see your doctor first of all, and then ask him/her if they can put you on a medical health plan, which will entitle you to 10 free visits to see a psychologist.
I always tend to suggest a psychologist because my experience with psychiatrists hasn't been successful, but there are people who do see them and have had success.
We would really like to hear back from you when you are able to. Geoff.
