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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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Guest_2350 Confused feelings
  • replies: 13

Hello All, I am currently doing CBT and starting psycho therapy next month and one of the returning thoughts that keeps bothering me to a great deal, is my ability to maintain friendships and relationships. I actually used to be very good in keeping ... View more

Hello All, I am currently doing CBT and starting psycho therapy next month and one of the returning thoughts that keeps bothering me to a great deal, is my ability to maintain friendships and relationships. I actually used to be very good in keeping up friendships & acquaintances and I used to blog, send post cards, letters and emails, call and see the ones that were close enough. My relationships (friends, family, acquaintances) are literally scattered all over the world, mainly Europe and Africa and now also in Australia. I have moved many times. For the last few years I found it more and more difficult to keep in touch with people and I started to doubt the intend of people and their actual feelings for me. Where I used to be very giving and forgiving, I am now very reserved and suspicious and bitter. I have again and again thinned out my contact list, created and deleted blogs & facebook & other social media accounts again and again and I am just wondering if I am the only one who gets so confused, who does not want to be in touch, who just does not know. And I am also wondering why this bothers me so much and I think I am so stupid, as it is as if a rich person worries about what to do with all the money. I feel so ungrateful and just stupid. I'm just wondering if this is part of depression and PTSD and if it will eventually get better and I will eventually feel something again that does not confuse me. Thanks, Yggy x

Elsie77 Sad
  • replies: 3

Woke up feeling very sad today

Woke up feeling very sad today

KTOCD Feeling like nothing is ever going to get better. Had enough
  • replies: 12

Hey, im having a really hard time. I feel like I make some progress and then we just go back to the beginning again. Things shouldn't be this hard. Hating how things are at the moment. Finding it so hard to be positive about anything. Sorry but neede... View more

Hey, im having a really hard time. I feel like I make some progress and then we just go back to the beginning again. Things shouldn't be this hard. Hating how things are at the moment. Finding it so hard to be positive about anything. Sorry but needed to offload. Need some space to rethink how I move forward. Feel like I'm running into a brick wall over and over again. KT

Perfectly Scattered Perfectionism + lack of control = Depression
  • replies: 10

Hi everyone, I am new here. This year has been beyond awful for my family. My 8yr old son developed severe OCD (likely linked to Autism- doing assessments now). Me being so driven believed I could 'fix' everything for him by immersing myself in all t... View more

Hi everyone, I am new here. This year has been beyond awful for my family. My 8yr old son developed severe OCD (likely linked to Autism- doing assessments now). Me being so driven believed I could 'fix' everything for him by immersing myself in all the info on OCD and taking him to his Psychologist- following all the rules to successfully beat OCD. I put everything I had into helping him only to feel like a complete failure when we had to resort to medication even though I am fully aware of the role serotonin takes in mental illness- I am not against medication- I was just upset that I did not achieve my goal unaided. I realise medication was necessary in my sons case- he had began to believe everyone and everything were poisonous, life in general was torture for him. Question to everyone... Does anyone else put such high and un-achievable expectations on yourself that when they are not reached you fall into a depression? I have noticed a pattern of this throughout my life, has anyone found a way to stop it happening? At the time I never feel like what I am expecting from myself was out of reach- it is only once my depression lifts that I truely realise how misguided I was.

Coastgal86 ">3 steps forward 2 steps back
  • replies: 3

Hello,I'm a 29 year old mother of 2 and have been diagnosed with depression and anxiety, I've been on an antidepressant now for a few months and have been doing yoga and reading a lot of self help books.but I go through stages where I feel great for ... View more

Hello,I'm a 29 year old mother of 2 and have been diagnosed with depression and anxiety, I've been on an antidepressant now for a few months and have been doing yoga and reading a lot of self help books.but I go through stages where I feel great for a few weeks then its like I hit a wall and am back to square one all over again! It can take me a few weeks to pick myself up again and it's just driving me insane going through the constant up and down.i don't have a very supportive husband or huge support system so I do feel alone a lot. Has anyone else experienced the ups and down whilst on meds and trying the other things? I was seeing a physiologist but stopped after feeling embarrassed that 2 mothers from school were working in the reception area i hope someone can relate xo

El_Guapo I am scared to death of falling apart again.
  • replies: 4

Hello everyone, I feel like I am starting to feel waves of depression, anxiety and all the other horrible things that come along with breaking down. I am 55 years of age and 22 years ago I went through Clinical Depression and it took me almost 18 mon... View more

Hello everyone, I feel like I am starting to feel waves of depression, anxiety and all the other horrible things that come along with breaking down. I am 55 years of age and 22 years ago I went through Clinical Depression and it took me almost 18 months to recover. I had no help no support and what I went through only god knows. I lost my wife, house, children and my mind in the process. Eventually I recovered and unexpectedly and a new partner came into my life, she was full of love, compassion, care and thanks to her my miserable life found love and hope again. We have been together for 20 years and now she is going through a full breakdown. Between us our relationship has been one of love, friendship and love being with each other. Some 20 months ago she had a minor midlife crisis and moved to her mums, she was riddled with guilt thinking how much it was hurting me, but somehow the fact, that I knew that her issues were to do with her own and not me gave me the strength to stay strong, at peace and be there for her, always loving supportive and reassuring. She moved in with her mum for six months and unfortunately though she is not aware of it her family and their expectations of her have been a major contribution to her persona of being a peoples pleaser and thinking of others before her self. After being with her mum for six months, we found a new beautiful apartment and move in together again. While I was at work she decided to study from home but being alone during the day and not having dealt with her issues and demons slowly broke her down until she was miserable and full of self hate, health issues,sadness,depression and slowly there was nothing left of her. As much as I tried to encourage her I was unable to help her. She left 8 weeks ago and has moved in back with her mum as she can not be left alone, she was unable to stay with me because she could not be surrounded by her life. Thankfully she has good medical support and counselling. We talk to each other ever few days and as always I am loving, supportive and never put any pressure on her in any way. However for the past week my mind has gone into thoughts of fear and suddenly I am also in a very bad way. I am not eating, full of tears, fear of the unknown, riddled with anxiety and finding it hard to cope, indeed I am sinking fast. I can not let her know what is happening to me as it would devastate her. My fear is, that somehow our love with die and she will not come back. Dear God help me.

Lost1985 Feeling lost and unwanted ...
  • replies: 1

Dear all I didn't think I would have to seek help - but I am really in need of advice ... For my whole life, I have pretended to play the part of the strong person - the unemotional person. I find my feelings are very cold to those who are nearest an... View more

Dear all I didn't think I would have to seek help - but I am really in need of advice ... For my whole life, I have pretended to play the part of the strong person - the unemotional person. I find my feelings are very cold to those who are nearest and dearest to me - and end up mistreating them . My relaitionship with my family - is a loving one - I absolutely love them to death - but I find in myself I get so cold - and have hateful thoughts . Most of my closest girlfriends I have either pushed away or have left me. the father of my child has also left me . And now my own child has no interest in me (side note - the only person I ever truly express the most emotion is to him ) i look at all the people around me and I consider just packing up and leaving and starting a new life by myself - which is the better option out of the thoughts in my head . I want to leave everyone and forget everyone - but I am scared to take that step. I honestly do not think I will be missed if this happens . Help - am I making the right choice ? kind regards lost ...

Guest_4987 Here we stand.
  • replies: 9

Hi, I wish I was not writing my thoughts on this forum but I am. To me this means I am in a dark space so I am therefore really glad to be letting some of my stuff out on this forum. Suffering from depression from a young age (some years worse than o... View more

Hi, I wish I was not writing my thoughts on this forum but I am. To me this means I am in a dark space so I am therefore really glad to be letting some of my stuff out on this forum. Suffering from depression from a young age (some years worse than others) I never give up trying to help myself, it has been couple of years now since I have slipped into the dark hole I find myself today but hey tomorrow is another day. How ever bad i think i feel you only need to look around the world and just think of how desperate and unsafe much of the world population is. When I was young to middle age I tried to block out my life I have since found that does not work, what to me does work is to be kind to myself, use meds if appropriate for you, counselling if available and try to stay out of my own head as much as possible, I can and do make situations so much worse if I delve to deeply into things which I should just let be. I contacted my Psychologist by email yesterday he phoned me within an hour and what a pleasure it was to talk to him, he had many positive thing to say which cheered me heaps, I must admit i have seen many Psychologists over the years and know you need to find the right one for you. I live in a isolated rural environment and am relying of forums like this for contact as not to feel so isolated and unconnected. Thats all for now. Shaun the Sheep

Blackbird1989 Finally ready to admit it.
  • replies: 2

It's taken me years to get to this point, and a couple of hours just to get the wording right, but I think I'm ready to finally say it out loud (or rather 'type' it out loud, so to speak). I have depression. I feel worthless, unlovable, completely la... View more

It's taken me years to get to this point, and a couple of hours just to get the wording right, but I think I'm ready to finally say it out loud (or rather 'type' it out loud, so to speak). I have depression. I feel worthless, unlovable, completely lacking in energy and enthusiasm, and I can't remember the last time I felt happy. I have very low self worth - I've stopped going out with friends, and often find excuses not to go out with my workmates because I am very introverted and get exhausted by social contact very quickly. I also find it difficult to make new friends, and have never been in a proper relationship because I don't feel like I'm worth loving. Every time I get close I pull away, because I'm scared they'll find out how unlovable I am (and in the case of relationships I feel like I would be preventing them from being with someone that deserves their love). I've never been suicidal, but constantly fantasize about flying away - changing my name and becoming a new person. I know that won't 'fix' me, but I feel such cognitive dissonance between my ideal and real self, I feel like a fraud, and I don't feel like I am who I should be. I don't expect anyone to fix me, least of all on an online forum, but I'm too scared to talk to someone about my feelings. I'm about to apply for a 2 year VISA to the UK , and I'll admit that a part of me is worried that a doctor would talk me out of it (I've been wanting to do this for over a decade, and it's honestly the only thing I've been excited about in a long time), but more importantly, I get very defensive and hate talking about myself, a one on one conversation is my idea of hell. Even thinking about going to the doctor and saying all of this out loud makes me feel anxious. Having finally gotten that all out, I don't feel like I've even scratched the surface. I hope it all makes sense

KTOCD Who else hates mirrors?? Worst thing ever!!
  • replies: 8

Hey, Ive got this thing that I've struggled with a long time and it hit me yesterday whilst I was Christmas shopping. I went out to my local shopping centre with a friend to do some shopping. Before I left home, I put a dress on, hair done, make up o... View more

Hey, Ive got this thing that I've struggled with a long time and it hit me yesterday whilst I was Christmas shopping. I went out to my local shopping centre with a friend to do some shopping. Before I left home, I put a dress on, hair done, make up on - ready to go and feeling ok with how I looked - even looked in the mirror at home and thought 'yep ok' asked my husband for reassurance and he said I looked great. The problem is that when I get to the shops and amongst people, I feel like the ugliest and worst dressed person there. I truly believe that everyone (and I mean everyone - from the young right up to the very old) are prettier and are looking far better than me. I can ignore it for a bit until I walk past a mirror in a clothes shop and then I'm blatantly reminded of it. Ive also put on a bit of weight lately. My logical brain tells me that I'm not that big and I can always loose it but the other side of my brain tells me I'm disgusting. I've struggled a bit as a teenager (33 now) with restricting food and vomiting after meals but that is long gone. I just don't know what this is?!? I plan to talk to my psychologist about it at my next appointment. Has anyone had this before and how did you manage it. It's kind of like at home I look like one person but when I get amongst people I look terrible. I get it at the hairdresser too. Before I leave home I'm feeling ok but when I get sat in front of a mirror with all these beautiful people around me, I feel so inferior and want to crawl into a hole. I thought that maybe it was an intrusive thought linked to my OCD but it's not really like my other intrusive thoughts. KT