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I was blocked by my friend and I feel no hope and struggled...

A sad boy
Community Member

Several months ago I met a friend, we talked very friendly and we regard each other as good ones. However, from the end of last month, I found that he always ignored what I said in the message and he exited some social network channels from myself. I feel very sad and tried asking some reasons on other social network to him, but he still did not ask me, until some days ago he blocked my account. I feel very struggled that I can not believe that he can do this...

I may make mistakes that I said too much to him in order to make me feel good, but I do not do bad things to him and what he said are all just good words or what he advice; I just wonder why he did so cruel behaviours -- because he said that we can keep contact during our only actual voice talk. I just do not understand that what he do now on earth because I do not know whether he is too busy to see my messages, or whether he do not like me suddenly, or whether he changed his heart. Whatever the reason is, I feel very sad and even desperate to face everything, because during more than one year with him, I paid too much attention to him but the result is very upset...

I do not know if I can solve this relationship, I really want to save it! But I do not know what solutions I can use, and I do not know if I can solve it by myself, which is very hard because I can not dare to contact him anymore now! I have another people which is closed to that friend to help with it potentially, but I do not dare to talk with him either because I will receive scorn from him. I just feel very terrible with it.

Now thinking with these things, I feel I am a totally fool and totally stupid! I should not have said so much words to satisfy myself, even if what I said is my advice and I feel very regretful! There is no one can understand myself, which makes me more terrible! I am so silly to make things messy, I make unforgivable things... I have experienced so much things but this time I feel that I am totally foolish... However at the same time I do not know why he is so sudden that I can not realise that he is like changing his characteristics to treat me like that! Maybe he and I both have mistakes...I just cry over and over again, day by day to face this, but I still want better solutions, or I do not know what I can do next...I am very sorry for saying this but thank you all for your help...This is my last destination to solve the solutions, or I really do not know what I can find and ask for!

1 Reply 1

tranzcrybe
Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor

When others do not reply (and ultimately block any contact), we tend to blame ourselves as something we said or did that caused this to happen - and indeed things we say can often be received in ways contrary to intention especially if not having the necessary subliminal cues of body language or inflexion in the tone of voice.
So, you were being yourself and open enough to speak your mind without reservation; and, unless you think you should stop being you, it is up to the other person to accept or reject this as they choose. But the approach they adopt only reflects on their character, for one can be accepting of another's virtues and faults respectfully and politely declining to continue the association. Even more credibility is afforded to those who can take the time to elaborate on this as a sign of compassion for the feelings of the other.
If you objectively evaluate the reality of your friendship, you might find that some of it can be attributed to your own interpretation of things that may not have been actually so; and that is not such a foolish thing since friendships are premised on trust and understanding to be comfortable to say what you feel without fear of rebuke.
Perhaps there might be a change of heart later where you can revisit this - maybe even a valid reason independent of what you believe presently. Take things as they come and try not to read too much into this until/if there is some follow up response.