How to get interested in life again?

[Damaged]

Hi all. I have been suffering anxiety and depression for a really long time. I am really trying to beat it though I always seem to find myself repeating the same patterns because anything outside of my standard routine is too hard to deal with. My life at the moment life consists of a 58 hour work week which doesn’t leave much time for anything through the week. On the weekends I catch up on house work, sleep and maybe see a movie and that’s about it.    

I have recently started going to therapy again and she told me I should find a hobby and find groups of people to meet up with,though meeting in any kind of group is kind of like hell for me. On top of that I really don’t have anything that I am interested in at the moment. Most of the time I just feel pretty empty inside. I guess I have lost interest in most things over the years.

I Know I need to socialize more if I want to improve, and there has to be more to life than work and bills though I am not sure where to start?

Maybe I am

past the point of no return?    

Beyondblue’s clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636.

[Scott_Depression]

Hey Sydney Geoff - great first post & sincere thanks on the compliments!  Welcome to Beyond Blue - I've only been posting on here since January - bit of a New Years resolution!

I'm glad to hear you're traveling ok at the moment & hope to see plenty more of you on the site!

Kind regards

Scott

[Scott_Depression]

Hi D

Glad to hear you're going ok at the moment - big high 5's on getting that appointment sorted - it can be such a hurdle to overcome for many on this site.  Think many feel they'll be judged, but that should rarely happen with professionals (let's face it, you get kooky people in all walks of life.

I've had same reaction to meds before - can knock you around a bit so take it easy with driving, etc.  Have you spoken to work at all?  It's a bit of a tough one - you'd hope they'd be supportive but wouldn't suggest you raise it unless pretty sure of a positive reaction.

Cheers

Scott

PS Ramble away - that's what this site is all about!

[Damaged]

Hi Scott. Not much to report at the moment.Still tired from med's. I can't really bring up my condition at work cause I know they won't be supportive.( Its a long story).I am planning to talk to my manager soon to change my hours to suite me better. I have no idea how they will take it,and if I can afford it though I think it might help me to get my head clear.

Cheers.

[Scott_Depression]

Sounds like a good plan, to reduce hours.  Will be good for mental health, I'm sure.

Wondered if you have a budget at the moment?  Yes - I sound like a damn accountant!!  

Seems like money is a big stress for you at the moment - would be good for you to work out a budget to help take control of the finances.  Doesn't need to be complicated.  For most banks you can dump say, last 3 or 6 months of transactions into Excel and you can see how much $$ you're bringing in and how much you spend on different things.

Sometimes it's hard to face up to looking at the finances, but if you can understand where you money is going (sounds like a lot is going on Mortgage) you should be able to see what can change.

One other thing while I think of it, can you perhaps change your mortgage from Principal & Interest to Interest only for a bit?  Will reduce payments and might help you get by. 

Another idea is to get a mortgage broker to visit you - they might be able to get you a better deal and save you some $$.  Actually, this is MY BEST IDEA YET!  Think you should definately do this - won't cost you anything, and might save you hundreds, if not thousands per year!!

Don't worry if you don't have much to feed back - I can always waffle on for both of us!!

Kind regards - almost at the weekend!

Scott

[Scott_Depression]

Hi D

Hope you're doing ok & getting to relax on the weekend

Kind regards

Scott

[Damaged]

Hi Scott. I'm doing ok. I think the meds are starting to work. Its still hard at times not to feel empty when you are so isolated. I am going to take a look at my finances next weekend. Thanks for the advice regarding the mortgage broker, hopefully they can save me some money. For now just relaxing. I really need to recharge before another week of work.

Cheers.

[Scott_Depression]

Hi D

No worries - make sure you take care of yourself - chat soon!

Kind regards

Scott

[Damaged]

Hi. Just a bit of an update.I spoke to my manager today to see if I can cut down my hours by a half an hour a day.He said they will consider it, so I hope they let me know soon. I also called my bank to see if I can negotiate my interest rate and got it cut by half a percent, which is pretty good I guess. Still might see a broker, not sure yet.Still a bit up and down at the moment. I wish I had more support from my family.I think the few family members I have left couldn't care if I was dead or alive. Which is distressing me a bit. Why are the people you should be able to count on never around when you need them?

They make me so mad.They just don't care at all.so as always Ill just have to rely on myself to get buy.

Sorry if this was a bit of a ramble. I will probably make more sense on the weekend.

Thanks for your support man. I hope your doing well.

[Scott_Depression]

Hi D

I'm doing ok, thanks mate

Half a percent is awesome, man! Just from a phone call - that saves you $500 per annum for every $100,000 on your mortgage.  If you have a $300k mortgage - saved yourself $500 x 3 = $1500 per year x however many years you might have.  I think because you're feeling a bit down, you're not necessarily celebrating like you should, but I understand!

Definitely get a mortgage broker in - don't have mates in Sydney that do that but reckon if you call Aussie they should look after you!  Might save another couple of grand per year.  Just imagine how hard you have to work to get that dough through the door - you could reduce hours, still pay off mortgage and get a bit more free time.

Can I ask what sort of job are you in?  Retail, Construction? No worries if you don't want to answer - don't name employer or anything - just might help me understand what sort of dynamics you're dealing with.  Are you part of a union or does your work have any employee welfare programs you might be able to access?

Regarding the family, it hard for me to assess to much over the net, but I'll throw some things out there.

Please don't be offended by this, but the nature of our disease means our perception is sometimes not necessarily correct, or in accordance with others opinions.  Heck, even 2 people without depression can cheer for 2 different footy teams and end up seeing umpires calls as good/terrible at the exact same time!  What I'm saying is that it's possible that your perception of what your family thinks of you MAY be exaggerated or wrong. 

I wonder if they're truly aware of what you're going through.  You can say to them that you don't need a lot of their time - just need to know they care.  Can you make a time to have them over for dinner / go to theirs and, without making a big deal of it talk to them casually about what you're going through?  Would be good to go in small groups - not big hoo-haa event!  Something to think about.

Chat again soon - take good care of yourself, my friend!

Kind regards

Scott

[Damaged]

Hey Scott.Yeah I am happy with the result on my home loan. I guess I just have not really had time to take it in. I am sure I will notice a difference next week when my payment is due.

As for my job I work as a warehouse supervisor. It is within the building industry. It is a very small place and doesn't have a union.The main reason I have to work such long hours is because the place is so understaffed. I have bought this up before to no avail. I am also still waiting for an answer regarding reducing my time there.

On the subject of my family.I know where you are coming from and I am not offended at all. The thing is they just never call or visit for that matter. Every time I speak to them I have to call them cause they just don't ring.Which leads me to the conclusion that when I call them I am just a inconvenience?

And I think the last time they visited was over a year ago.So I could have depression clouding my judgement though I think the are just generally frustrating people. lol 

I have tried to explain my condition to them though like so many others they just want to change the subject fast and talk about something else.But I will try to make another effort to explain how bad things can get.

Thanks for all your help. Hope you have a great weekend.And will talk to you soon.

Cheers.

D