Feeling really helpless

[Juliepie]

Hello, I'm new to this forum I'm not really sure if this is in the right spot as I haven't been officially diagnosed or anything or seen anyone about this. I've always felt like I am a failure though, I can't reach parent expectations, I feel estranged from my friendship groups. I don't articulate well when talking to people outside and while I'm at work.

I don't really know how to improve or where to go from here and can't help but blame myself for the fact that I am the way I am or anything I do never turns out well and that everyone around me secretly dislikes me. I'm in my 20s and I feel like I should be able to accept or not care whether I'm liked or not, or carry on after messing up but it continuously eats me up inside and it's like a repetitive and vicious cycle that happens constantly every week or two. I have really hated myself for awhile now and feeling very alone as there is nobody I feel close enough to talk to about how I'm feeling and I'm not sure what I can do about me.

[softdrinksandwich]

Hi Juliepie,

I'm glad you've messaged here, it seems like you're having quite the tough time so it's wonderful you've reached out. It seems like you're putting an awful amount of pressure on yourself.

Firstly, I think it's a great time to speak to a professional about this. There's a reason you're feeling like this, and understanding it better can be the first step to moving away from it. I was incredibly judgemental on myself for many years (and I sometimes still am, can't help it), but speaking to someone helped me call out that behaviour better, and learn that it wasn't helping me.

Secondly, I'd like to think you are doing better thank you think in the world. A lot of this could be your own perspective, and it's important to work on that first - it's not whether everyone around you dislikes you or not, it's whether no matter what, you like or dislike yourself.

I hope this can help, and I'm happy to share and chat more about my own experiences with this kind of situation if that would help at all. Also here to just listen and learn more about what's going on. Take care.

[james1]

Hello Juliepie

Welcome to the forums, and thank you for your post.

It is sad to hear you feel like a failure and feel really alone. I had a lot of similar thoughts a few years back, so I understand it is really tough to deal with all these thoughts and feelings, especially when you feel like there's nobody to talk to. So it's really great that you've posted here, because these forums are a safe space for you to tell us whatever you feel comfortable saying. Many of us will be able to understand where you are coming from, and share our own experiences.

I understand you're also struggling to figure out what to do from here, and you feel really helpless. As softdrinksandwich mentioned, there are professionals who can help - have you ever considered speaking to a doctor? Usually, a GP can be a good start and they can help give advice and, if you want, guide you towards any other therapy. BeyondBlue also has a telephone service (1300 22 4636) who are great for people seeking advice or just support.

It's nice to meet you here and I hope you can find what you are looking for. We're here to listen to you.

James