don’t really know how to explain how I’ve been feeling lately. I just feel completely lost. Every day I feel like I lose another little piece of myself, and sometimes I don’t even recognise who I am anymore.
Most of the time I either feel sad, angry, overwhelmed or completely numb. I still have moments where I’m genuinely happy and laugh and feel normal, but they never seem to last. Underneath everything there’s this constant heaviness and exhaustion. I feel like I’m existing rather than actually living. Sometimes I wish I could just go to sleep and not wake up, or that somehow I could disappear without having to do anything myself. I don’t have a plan to physically hurt myself, and weirdly that sometimes makes me feel like a fraud like maybe I’m not actually struggling enough to deserve help.
I also can’t say any of this to anyone my dad doesn’t understand, I’m estranged to my sisters I don’t want to be a bummer to my friends and I couldn’t add another worry to my mum
