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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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TheBigBlue Feelings of shame - where do they stem from?
  • replies: 5

Hi Team, I’ve been on a long journey in my battle with anxiety, depression & CPTSD. A few years on & find myself in a “better” mental position. I joined a local soccer team. It was a fantastic step as it meant I incorporated exercise into my routine,... View more

Hi Team, I’ve been on a long journey in my battle with anxiety, depression & CPTSD. A few years on & find myself in a “better” mental position. I joined a local soccer team. It was a fantastic step as it meant I incorporated exercise into my routine, I get out of the house for training & game day & I’ve met some people from my local community. Now we are an over 40’s team, so aren’t the fast, most athletic or skilfull team you might come across, but we can match it with the other teams in the comp. So I’m unfit, haven’t exercised in over 10 years & it seems I have lost my sense of balance. I fell over twice in the trial match, & again today I fell over twice. My legs just turn to jelly & down I go. I can’t even stand/balance on one foot anymore. so today I stacked it while trying to run, got up, tried to run & stacked it again. I felt fine, but my legs just weren’t working like they should. Immediately one of my team mates called for an interchange because they thought I was suffering hypoglycaemia (low blood glucose) with my type 1 diabetes. They did the right thing, they did the safe thing. But I knew it wasn’t low blood sugar. I wear a continuous glucose monitor which is stuck in my arm, & it communicates with my insulin pump. I just need to look at my pump screen & it tells me my numbers & gives me a graph so I can see how my levels are trending. So I go off, people are offering me juice/candy etc but I did a blood test to double check & all was fine. But the amount of shame I now feel is immense. The embarrassment of being uncoordinated, maybe having some weird balance issue I was unaware of, my diabetes, looking like a fool. I’ve been angry at myself all day. I don’t want to show my face to those teammates again cause I feel like I’m the one they have to treat “special”. I grew up being ashamed of my type 1 diabetes diagnosis as people don’t understand the difference between type 1 & type 2, & just assume I ate the wrong things growing up. FYI type 1 is an autoimmune condition where your immune system destroys the beta cells in your pancreas. The beta cells are hat produces insulin. Once they are destroyed you can’t “fix” them or grow more. You rely on injected insulin for the rest of your life. So now I have all this childhood shame back where I worry that people think “I don’t take proper care of myself” combined with the humiliation of falling over & im back to hating myself again. Why is it being uncoordinated brought all that shame back?

Ps993 Depression and negativity, do you ever win?
  • replies: 7

So I’ve struggled with depression for as long as I can remember.. (I’m 27) I’ve been thru a lot that has contributed to my negative mind and depression. I have seen multiple psychologists and have been one many different antidepressants (still am) I ... View more

So I’ve struggled with depression for as long as I can remember.. (I’m 27) I’ve been thru a lot that has contributed to my negative mind and depression. I have seen multiple psychologists and have been one many different antidepressants (still am) I want to know.. because I’m alway so negative about myself and the depression just drags me down.. does anyone every really overcome it? Or anyone successfully switched their mindset to much more positive? I changed my life for the better entirely.. and I’m in a really good place but I still constantly struggle mentally.. I am feeling like no matter what I do.. I’ll never feel truely happy

strawb3rry_milk How to feel happy
  • replies: 2

I'm 15, on my school holidays right now. Like always, I'm stressed and anxious about going back to school despite getting good grades, having a large net of friends. I don't even know why I'm feeling this way. I can pinpoint (or at least, remember) t... View more

I'm 15, on my school holidays right now. Like always, I'm stressed and anxious about going back to school despite getting good grades, having a large net of friends. I don't even know why I'm feeling this way. I can pinpoint (or at least, remember) the day when this switch swapped in my head and I became deeply unhappy. I don't think I had let the stress of school and the world into my psyche before then. But suddenly I stopped talking as much, stopped contributing in class, making any sort of effort with my friends. I was completely exhausted by everything. Fatally bored all the time. Since then, outwardly at least, I have become a imitation of what I was before; I doubt anyone noticed the shift between old, happy me and new "happy" me, but I certainly feel it. I haven't been happy in so so long. And last year, I didn't mind so much. Like I know being sad is miserable, but sometimes it was okay. I can't describe it. But it's gotten to a certain point where I really want to be happy, but cannot figure out how. I'm so weighted down, and there is this incredible pressure in my chest. I'm so tired. I thought until about ten minutes ago that I was probably being sad for attention. But nobody knows. And in some ways, mental illness is, in my grade, a competition. My friends leave class crying, which is horrible for them and I want them to be okay, but it also means they get a lot of attention (which they need). And I'm always checking in on them. But they never ask me. I have only left class once, sobbing, because of something that I had found out during the lesson. Even then I didn't let them see me cry. I'm incapable of letting them see me cry. And to make matters worse, a lot of horrifying events have just been uncovered about someone close to me that I don't have the ability to grapple with. I want someone to pull me out of my life and say,"You're okay, you just need a break and then you can go back in a couple months, when you feel better." I've talked to the councillor but found their explanations too simplistic. Equating everything back to school. I'm looking for anything, honestly. I just don't know how to live like this anymore. Thanks for getting this far

Meliss Getting married and feeling down, am I normal?
  • replies: 18

First off I have to say I have a lot going on. I am struggling with every day functioning at the moment. I feel more depressed after covid lockdown than when we were in lockdown. I don't want to go anywhere and I don't want to do anything. I'd rather... View more

First off I have to say I have a lot going on. I am struggling with every day functioning at the moment. I feel more depressed after covid lockdown than when we were in lockdown. I don't want to go anywhere and I don't want to do anything. I'd rather just lay around all day. I am due to be married soon, but we have postponed twice already. My friend is trying to talk to me about the wedding and all I can do is be sad. 2 of my family members had covid. My mother in law has alzheimers and is getting worse by the day. I just feel like what's the point of anything. My eating has gone bad. I don't even feel like cooking and I normally love it. 2 of our bridal party are overseas and 1 moved interstate. And on top of all of this I hate my job. I signed up for a class last year, only to find I hated it. So now I'm back at square one. I just want to get a job where I am appreciated. I worked right through covid and it feels like everything is catching up with me now. I must say I do love my fiancee and it's not him making me feel this way. . He's a beautiful person who I love very much and look forward to being married to. I'm over it all. What's the point of anything. What can I do? This is the worst i have felt for a long time.

nick99 overseas and extremely depressed
  • replies: 7

We had to relocate to Europe from Australia because of a family emergency in my wife’s family. Pretty much pack up and move overseas. I just hate it here. It’s cold, expensive, I don’t speak the language, and I have zero hope of ever getting a job he... View more

We had to relocate to Europe from Australia because of a family emergency in my wife’s family. Pretty much pack up and move overseas. I just hate it here. It’s cold, expensive, I don’t speak the language, and I have zero hope of ever getting a job here. My job in Australia is still open to me so that’s a bit of a blessing. I don’t like my wife’s family much. They are cold and icy. My wife is just angry all the time. It’s a living hell. I want to go back to Australia, difficult with the current COVID situation. When we lived in Australia I worked and my wife stayed at home to take care of our three year old. I also did all the housework, all the shopping yet here she is totally changed. She has managed to get a job but the pay is terrible. You get more on the dole in Australia. We had quite a lot in savings but that’s gonna all be gone and I daren’t ask how much is left. I feel totally lost. I’ve tried to discuss it with my wife but she says she doesn’t want to move back and we have no family there. We barely see her family here anyway I think Australia is a much nicer place for a child to grow up. I am so depressed here. I feel like a animal thats been taken out of it's habitat and put in a cage. I have family in England but can't see them either cause of COVID.

Niki9 Loneliness after a breakup
  • replies: 5

Hi guys, It's been one month since I broke up with my ex (3 year relationship). We loved eachother, but there were various incompatibilities between us (our political views were vastly different, he is conservative whilst I am more progressive, I am ... View more

Hi guys, It's been one month since I broke up with my ex (3 year relationship). We loved eachother, but there were various incompatibilities between us (our political views were vastly different, he is conservative whilst I am more progressive, I am very open minded whereas he isn't, I'm spontaneous and love going out and exploring whilst he's a home body & likes staying in his comfortable settings, etc. etc.). Although deep down I know that my decision to end it was the right one, I now feel so sad and lonely and miss his company so much. He has a solid group of mates whom I know he is now going out with and spending time with to try and get over me, whilst I lack that. I don't have any solid friends. I have some work colleagues but they all lead their own lives with their own relationships & friends. My best friend who is my person in every way lives in Melbourne, whilst I live in Sydney Whilst everyone goes out on weekends with their friends, I go to the gym and then stay cooped up at home with else nothing to do but go out for lunch with mum occasionally. I have a sister who I'm close with but she has her own friends who I don't really vibe with, and has her own thing going on in general. I'm also the type of person who finds it very hard to make friends and connect with people on a friendship level, and often can't get passed the 'acquaintance' stage. I would also rather have a smaller circle of true, deep friends, over a heap of friends with shallow connections. I crave a group of people who understand me, and who I can talk to about all my feelings, and go on nights out with and go exploring with. But at the same time, I'm aware that I'm not actually doing anything about the situation in terms of trying to make friends, simply because I'm not good at it, and I'm picky with people, and don't know where to start. I'm stuck in a rut. I'm lonely, bored, sad and just crave some good friends to not only help me get through my breakup woes, but to do life with. PLEASE HELP!

Mum of adult children My partner is obsessed with misogynistic and homophobic topics - it’s impacting on me causing depression
  • replies: 12

My husband of 7 years (I’m 61) has become increasingly obsessed with misogynistic, anti feminist, anti climate science, homophobic discussion topics. Not a meal goes by with our family that he doesn’t introduce one of these topics and rant on until p... View more

My husband of 7 years (I’m 61) has become increasingly obsessed with misogynistic, anti feminist, anti climate science, homophobic discussion topics. Not a meal goes by with our family that he doesn’t introduce one of these topics and rant on until people leave the table or it becomes a horrible argument. When I state my point of view, usually defending the alternate view, he yells over me or anyone else at the table. Even when we are not in company, he argues with me, telling me he doesn’t give a shit for my opinion, or telling me I speak too loudly. All devices to stop me from speaking. He is able to govern his opinions in the workplace usually, or with groups publicly, but he let’s fly with my children, friends and relatives. He’s turned some of my relatives off and my children and their partners seem to prefer being with their other family members. The antipathy people feel towards my husband is isolating me from family and friends as his wife and I think it’s contributing to my depression. I’ve constantly been working since I was divorced 20 years ago and I’ve supported our family with my income while my husband has struggled with finding regular work. He suffered as a child with being sexually molested and also lack of affection from his mother which I think causes his underlying feelings. He won’t get psychological help. I’ve suggested it many times and a few times demanded he do so to address his anger issues. I feel like my love for him is being eroded and I am depressed about my future with his resentment of women and how that impacts me, my daughter, my extended family and my friends. Should I insist he gets help, or ignore his outbursts and do my own thing with others without him, or leave this marriage. I’m feeling so depressed, lonely and anxious.

trqltea Waiting for appointment w/ psych... what to do in the mean time?
  • replies: 3

Hi everyone, I'm new here! I've gone to my GP recently about my increasing low moods and general tiredness/lack of interest towards everything in my life, and she suggested that I might have depression. Unfortunately, tried to book an appointment wit... View more

Hi everyone, I'm new here! I've gone to my GP recently about my increasing low moods and general tiredness/lack of interest towards everything in my life, and she suggested that I might have depression. Unfortunately, tried to book an appointment with a psychologist aaannnd there's a 2 month wait list. Problem is, I feel myself getting worse every day. Most of my hours are spent sleeping or feeling extremely agitated and unsettled and it feels like things won't ever improve. So... while I wait my for my appointment in June, is there anything I can do to feel better? I know a psychologist won't 'fix' me, so I should try a few things at least before I get there... I've heard meditation is helpful, but I really don't know where to start.

Veve trying to move on
  • replies: 3

in my 40s, mid life blues have come into my mix of depression and anxiety along with stress of being out of work and trying g to find a job! first time posting and saying hello

in my 40s, mid life blues have come into my mix of depression and anxiety along with stress of being out of work and trying g to find a job! first time posting and saying hello

highhopes Miserable in life - Contamination OCD / Depression - wishing I had a friend
  • replies: 1

Hey all, Thanks for your time reading my post. I actually suffer from the following: Contamination OCD Depression Anxiety PTSD My contamination OCD affects every single thing I do in my life and everything everyone else does around me (such as my par... View more

Hey all, Thanks for your time reading my post. I actually suffer from the following: Contamination OCD Depression Anxiety PTSD My contamination OCD affects every single thing I do in my life and everything everyone else does around me (such as my partner). I have extreme anxiety when it comes to bringing something in the house (or even from one area of the house to another sometimes) and even going to the mailbox I have to have a shower (new clothes required). After work I shower before touching anything in the house unless I can help it (only door handles I touch and wipe afterwards). I wipe my phone down and the floor behind me. I have an extreme phobia of Cigerette smoke and panic being anywhere near it as well as get panicked seeing it on tv. I am still productive in some sense as I love gardening but still get frustrated when I get dirt under my nails even though I use latex gloves. Even though there is people around me like family and my partner, i'm feeling extremely lonely inside going through this on a day to day basis. I am on a particular medication which is helping but there is still a worrying feeling that overlays in everything I do. I'm so worried that bringing something into the house and letting myself touch surfaces will then in itself become contaminated. I wish in some ways I could forget what I know. I've struggled with a number of things in life which has eaten away at my self esteem and its now to the point where it latched onto my OCD and I now can't even feel like I can wash my hands properly (let alone anything else in life).

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