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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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Living57 Hit rock bottom and I dont know how to cope
  • replies: 1

I've just moved to a new house its everything I want. You think I'd be happy but I'm finding it hard. I've had to rely on a family member to help me and my anxiety peaked and I started questioning had I used him too much, I probably could have done t... View more

I've just moved to a new house its everything I want. You think I'd be happy but I'm finding it hard. I've had to rely on a family member to help me and my anxiety peaked and I started questioning had I used him too much, I probably could have done things myself albeit slower. I'm now lost. I feel absolutely miserable and have spent the last few days bursting in to tears and crying. I am so alone. My depression is starting to be my everyday. I can't fo anything, my motivation is gone. I have no energy and no interest in anything. I've spent today laying in bed because the thought of getting up and having to do something to get the house sorted is too much for me. I am at the bottom of the hole and the black dog is not letting me out. I just wish the hole would cave in around me.

Me2428 Vicarious trauma, depression and PTSD symptoms plus a disintegrating marriage - I'm struggling
  • replies: 2

I am a counsellor and I worked with a huge amount of trauma and abuse, both with perpetrators and victims/survivors. I broke down doing this work as a result of vicarious trauma and my own childhood issues of abuse. I was, and still am, experiencing ... View more

I am a counsellor and I worked with a huge amount of trauma and abuse, both with perpetrators and victims/survivors. I broke down doing this work as a result of vicarious trauma and my own childhood issues of abuse. I was, and still am, experiencing PTSD symptoms, particularly intrusive thoughts and I get triggered a lot. I go to pieces when I get triggered. When things were getting bad I became depressed and was close to losing my mind. My relationship with my wife became verbally and psychologically toxic and although we are still together, we continue to drift further and further apart. So much of my life has disappeared. I miss my father and brother who have both passed away, I am estranged from my mother and I barely ever get to see my sister due to Covid and distance. My daughter has been impacted by my poor parenting and my son also struggles with depression. I have no friends anymore. I am very much alone and I am struggling. I believe I will soon separate from my wife which will mean I leave our family home and will likely be homeless. My employment is likely to end at the end of the financial year because my work cannot put me back on counselling work and I agree with them on this. I feel totally lost and as I said, I am feeling very much alone. I don't know why I am writing this, I am just grasping for something. My usual self-care is failing me and my meds are not helping as much as I would like. Again, I am losing control and I'm worried I am starting to spiral again. I don't have any idea what to do anymore.

bee_w21 Hello all, new here
  • replies: 1

Hi all, I will say I am new here because it has been a quite a few years since I have posted. I little background on me - I'm in my mid-thirties, I moved interstate around 8 years ago to pursue further study, but also to kind of escape from a toxic l... View more

Hi all, I will say I am new here because it has been a quite a few years since I have posted. I little background on me - I'm in my mid-thirties, I moved interstate around 8 years ago to pursue further study, but also to kind of escape from a toxic longterm romantic relationship and toxic family dynamic. Growing up my father was quite abusive (emotionally and sometimes physically) and I was bullied quite a lot in school. I would say my self esteem has been very low for most of my life, and on reflection I would say I have been experiencing anxiety and depression since I was a child. I have also had issues with alcohol abuse, which seems to run in my family. Moving interstate was the best decision for me, but those first few years were very difficult. My self esteem was in shreds, and the only person I knew was the best friend of my ex-partner. While they were supportive and lots of fun in some ways, they were also quite narcisstic and quite into the party scene. During that time I was drunk and hungover a lot, whilst also trying to study full time and work to support myself. I managed to obtain my degree but I performed very poorly. I was also struggling with quite a lot of social anxiety which made it difficult to form friendships and so I was quite lonely a lot of the time. And I was constantly looking outside of myself for validation, felt very lost and out of touch with who I really was, and so that made it difficult to connect with others. I would say now that I am in quite a good place. I've cut some toxic people out of my life and formed some good friendships - not heaps, but a few that feel fulfilling. I have a wonderful partner who shares my vision of what a good life is. We live in a great neighboorhood, in a modest but comfortable apartment, and we have enough money to treat ourselves to nice experiences. I know I have a good life and there is so much to be grateful for, but I still have days when I feel very low and empty, and I struggle to get out of bed. I think mostly I just feel numb, and then I'll have one really bad day once a week where I spend the day in bed crying. I was seeing a psychologist but I got the point where it started to feel indulgent - I wasn't feeling distressed, but I wasn't feeling good, and I didn't know how to move forward. I started to feel ashamed for feeling the way I did given the hardships many others are experiencing, and so I stopped and now I just feel stuck.

anonymous85231 Family & work is this all there is ...
  • replies: 2

I'm struggling. In the last decade my life has changed substantially and I'm not sure for the better. In the last decade I fell in love, followed her to the other side of the world, got married, had a kid, qualified in my profession got a couple of p... View more

I'm struggling. In the last decade my life has changed substantially and I'm not sure for the better. In the last decade I fell in love, followed her to the other side of the world, got married, had a kid, qualified in my profession got a couple of promotions ... everything you could want right? Between the stress of my job, the lack of intimacy in my marriage, a kid that takes any remaining energy I have, the lack of friends I now have because I moved to a country where I know no-one and no time to make new ones, Covid and isolation has ended other friendships I just don't see a way out. Add to this the wife wanting a second kid (and time is against her), we want to buy a house, but the added financial stress of doing so scares the crap out of me and throw in a healthy dose of my mother-in-law having lived with us for the last 16 months as she got stuck in this country because of covid and I find myself wanting to scream. 9 months ago I was feeling similar. I decided to share some of this with my wife (mother-in-law, intimacy) but nothing changed. I asked to go for family counselling to address our mismatched libido but she says it's a function of our kid taking all her energy and her mother being here. At that point we hadn't had sex in over a year. Now the only time we are intimate is when she thinks she's ovulating and even then it's once every couple of months at best. I also decided back then to focus more on myself, got back in the gym, tried to make plans away from the family, but fast forward and I just dont have the energy to do so. It's reached the stage where I just want to sleep all day. I can barely drag myself out of bed let along engage with others. I'm increasingly irritable at work. I love my wife, most days I love my job, I love my son. So why do I feel like this. What is wrong with me?

Johnny_was_down Facebook thread
  • replies: 2

Hi I am getting this on my Facebook thread how do I say this is real and I will be suffering this for the rest of my life ? I have got systems in place to help me get through when I’m feeling down and am good at this time , now I can’t post the threa... View more

Hi I am getting this on my Facebook thread how do I say this is real and I will be suffering this for the rest of my life ? I have got systems in place to help me get through when I’m feeling down and am good at this time , now I can’t post the thread but it’s a depression one maybe you have seen it?

Bubble44 What should I do now that I've completely given up?
  • replies: 4

Firstly don't panic I don't plan on committing suicide. But the will to live is pretty much all I have left. I am 100% certain nothing will ever get better. It's just after everything I've been through I owe it to myself to seize whatever tiny happy ... View more

Firstly don't panic I don't plan on committing suicide. But the will to live is pretty much all I have left. I am 100% certain nothing will ever get better. It's just after everything I've been through I owe it to myself to seize whatever tiny happy moments I might have by living a full life. They don't make it worth it, but I don't believe in an afterlife where I'll be happy or anything so those moments are all I've got. My family abused me. Most of my friends abandoned me because I and several others (who luckily I'm still friends with) have the horrific opinion that rape is wrong. I'm pretty sure most girls would rather do anything else than start a relationship with me. The second they notice my anxiety or depression, they vanish. Every time. Hope is pain. That's all it is. Every time I let myself feel hope the world finds a way to spit in my face. It's like I only exist to watch other people find happiness. I'm just an extra in their story because no one ever thought I deserved one of my own. And they never will. It's like the only thing that keeps me going is misery, which is insane. But it's the strongest part of me and pretty much the only thing in my life that I can trust. It will always be there when I wake up in the morning. It's like misery is my bones. It's all that even holds my sanity together. Sorry for the overdramatic poetry but I can't be bothered to tell my full story right now. I just wanted to vent about how I feel. I have no idea what the hell to do with myself. Everything I ever do finds a way to crumble into nothing. Why should I bother trying at anything, ever? I know where it ends. Me, in a hospital bed at 80, dying of cancer and desperately wishing I killed myself when I was 21 (again, I won't. Don't panic).

poss93 The endless goal of life
  • replies: 7

Hi everyone, I'm new here and am looking for aspace tp discuss my thoughts and seek help and insight to other peoples thoughts on myown. I am 27 y/o currently work casual but maintain part-time hours whilst studying a Tafe course for youth work, I in... View more

Hi everyone, I'm new here and am looking for aspace tp discuss my thoughts and seek help and insight to other peoples thoughts on myown. I am 27 y/o currently work casual but maintain part-time hours whilst studying a Tafe course for youth work, I invest my time in out doo activities and love to attend my boxing classes and regular gym classes during the week. I am not new to depression and do see someone regularly as I can, I have had to drop out of my fulltime job as of August last year due to suicidal thoughts and bad mental health which I have had for most of my life (progressed more into my mid to late 20's). I would like to get another fulltime job again but can already feel and see what would happen. I know I would get sick of it straight away and struggle to maintain a positive attitude towards it every day. Even though just this is the first time I have dropped down from a fulltime position to casual position I'm scared that I wont be able to handle it. I need more income to work toward buying my own home and life expenses in general but I know that work life balance just wont be there any more. Part-time positions are so hard to come by even though I have been applying since December last year I haven't heard back at all. It is all starting to seem so pointless now and I don't know how people "normal people" push through just work and home life on a regular. I get so depressed and so dethatched, I just don't understand how others make it possible what should I do? How can I find motivation to push through and get a fulltime job again in a company or industry I don't really care about for the money?

Codie_ann Postnatal depression and loneliness
  • replies: 2

Hi all, ive recently had a baby and my partner is fifo, all my family live in other states and ive been struggling with loneliness alot lately. Trying to find things to fill my days at home with my baby seem very difficult and i just feel so lonely a... View more

Hi all, ive recently had a baby and my partner is fifo, all my family live in other states and ive been struggling with loneliness alot lately. Trying to find things to fill my days at home with my baby seem very difficult and i just feel so lonely and empty in the house by myself all day, i try and get out the house but i dont see the point as i dont have anywhere to go or anything to do, my friend circle is very small and everyone is at work during the day so im by myself all day long. Anyone else going through something similar?

SleepDrifter After I found out Tim died, I decided that what I needed to do at that moment was to choose an album to say goodbye to
  • replies: 3

I needed something that fit the mood, best I could but I knew I would never be able to go back to again. I chose All of a Sudden I Miss Everyone by Explosions in the Sky. I miss him

I needed something that fit the mood, best I could but I knew I would never be able to go back to again. I chose All of a Sudden I Miss Everyone by Explosions in the Sky. I miss him

Garfield2020 Stuck in a pit and I don't know how to improve and climb out
  • replies: 7

Hi, I just wanted to post and touch on somethings. For context, I’m a student in my second year. Sorry I don’t really know how to word a lot of this. I don’t really feel like I’m functioning. I feel like I lack a lot of life skills and that my anxiet... View more

Hi, I just wanted to post and touch on somethings. For context, I’m a student in my second year. Sorry I don’t really know how to word a lot of this. I don’t really feel like I’m functioning. I feel like I lack a lot of life skills and that my anxiety stops me from doing a lot of normal stuff. I avoid doing a lot of things because of anxiety. I don’t really get panic attacks or anything. I know someone who does but somehow, they manage to integrate better into society than I do while I just feel like an alien trying to integrate with human society. I sometimes do things weird ways or do dumb shit since I’ve always considered it normal and then I get like laughed at (I know they don’t mean it in a bad way and the dumb shit I do is harmless) but it does hurt. I'm sorry I can't give any specific examples, but I remember getting shit for things like how I moved during PE in highschool (since I did dance and that affected how I moved). When teens go through puberty, they get jokes made at their expense about their voice being funny or other things. And I'm scared I'm going to get those jokes from my friends too since I just started Puberty 2 since I'm NB. It's almost like I was left to my own devices or that’s what I feel like and was never like raised to like function or anything. But I know that’s not the case since my sister is doing fantastic and all this shit but I just can’t seem to. And concerning what I put this post here for is the depression aspect. I only just realised how much I’ve been isolating myself. I don’t really know when it started honestly since it took me until a few years ago to recognise that my idea of Normal was actually just me being depressed, I think. I honestly just feel like I’m rotting. I did deactivate a lot of my social media accounts so I could get my shit together but now without the serotonin, I just feel like my days all become a haze since there’s nothing remarkably good or bad about them. I'm not lazy but I genuinely can’t get shit done. And I did try to get my shit together but it didn’t last for long. And then throw in emotional suppression problems. I don’t really know what to do. I do have a counsellor and whatnot and luckily that's free but it's been inaffective. I've tried dealing with the emotional supression problems but it's really hard to find resources on how to deal with that (though I'm still consciouslly working on dealing with it). I just don't know how to climb out and improve. I just don't know.

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