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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with Depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with Depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the chats on this Forum having been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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white knight Caring for the mentally unwell
  • replies: 7

The vast majority of carers do not have any training to be a carer. Most times they are simply partners that fall into that role. So how do they cope? Unfortunately when the mentally ill are unwell we tend to drift into the "it's all about me" syndro... View more

The vast majority of carers do not have any training to be a carer. Most times they are simply partners that fall into that role. So how do they cope? Unfortunately when the mentally ill are unwell we tend to drift into the "it's all about me" syndrome. This is natural as our minds fund the basic tasks daunting. Symptoms like insecurity, headaches, feelings of low self esteem and exhaustion find us with little patien f2f e even towards those reaching out to us. Regardless of our depression and it's associated difficulties we still have an obligation towards our carer. For example: if you feel bedridden but you are capable in attending the bathroom or answering your phone or watching TV then when your carer returns home from their job, you are capable of making him/her a cuppa. A simple form if expressing gratitude. That basic task is symbolic in expression of respect. Many carers end up with stress related issues over time. They run a household, often work, listen to our struggles and don't have anyone to listen to theirs. This can wear a carer down to the point of wanting to escape. Carers need care and appreciation, the least we can do is show it when we have the capacity to do so. Consider respite for your carer. Encourage them to socialise even if you cannot join them and a hobby. Their contentment in those areas will create a good balance rather than a life of work and caring with no end in sight of any substantial improvement in our depressed state. Carers need us too. Are you a carer? Do you have ideas on how your "patient could help you? TonyWK

yeahnah12 Hi? Idk what to do.
  • replies: 3

hi, idk what to do. I've reached the point where I have no clue what to do with my life anymore. It has no direction and I am lacking any sort of motivation or ambition. I have felt rather numb as of late, but I've found I am very good at pretending ... View more

hi, idk what to do. I've reached the point where I have no clue what to do with my life anymore. It has no direction and I am lacking any sort of motivation or ambition. I have felt rather numb as of late, but I've found I am very good at pretending I'm okay in the presence of others. I'm currently trying to apply for universities for degrees I know I am qualified for but at the end of the day I know deep down I have no passion or drive to endure. I cannot imagine a future self, something I have personally struggled with for years. I have no clue what I want to be, what I want to do, or what even makes me happy. I feel as though I have lost myself by trying to please others and its gotten to the point where I don't know who I am. I don't have any motivations, ambitions or undying passions. Everyone around me has some sort of direction, some people have everything planned out, others have numerous spontaneous pathways and the rest have some vague, but passionate, pathways. I don't. I say I'm interested in certain subjects, which I was, but I have no clue what I want to do with them. My lack of motivation has made it difficult to navigate my last year of school, and has been overwhelming at times. Especially with the prospect that everything I have done and studied leads me into a pathway I will forever despise and regret. I feel like my friends and family will judge me if I tell them this, that I'll disappoint them, or they'll not take it seriously. I'm suppose to be the 'high-achiever' but my grades have been slipping, I can't concentrate in class and idk what I want to do in the future. Some days its hard to even get out of bed and I feel like every day is just another masquerade. I'm just utterly and completely lost in life. I just was wondering if anyone could give me advice? I have no clue what I'm even asking but anything would be helpful. Thank you.

Postado Demotivated Struggle
  • replies: 3

Hello, I have been struggling with depression and disassociation for a long time now. I have trouble identifying feelings and emotions. Been seeing a psychologist who has been helping me out with hypnosis therapy. Stuff actually works.. I have begun ... View more

Hello, I have been struggling with depression and disassociation for a long time now. I have trouble identifying feelings and emotions. Been seeing a psychologist who has been helping me out with hypnosis therapy. Stuff actually works.. I have begun to disassociate less which I suppose it's good? But that means I am left dealing with all these emotions and feelings but I have not much idea of what they mean. Anyways the one feeling that I am struggling with the most is a feeling of emotional pain that comes whenever I try to do anything. Example I like drawing.. if I decide that I want to draw I have the initial motivation to come up with the idea but as soon as I pick up a pencil or make a move I get crushed by this overwhelming emotional pain. This happens when ever I try do something I 'like'... It seems the only thing I can do is lay down or sit still. Has anyone else experienced something like this or have an idea of what I could do to get past this?

Chook3 Lost
  • replies: 4

Hello I am really struggling atm. I have recently separated from my husband of 20yrs, it was a mutual decision but I am struggling so much, I feel so detached from everything even my own kids, I took on extra responsibility at work at the same time, ... View more

Hello I am really struggling atm. I have recently separated from my husband of 20yrs, it was a mutual decision but I am struggling so much, I feel so detached from everything even my own kids, I took on extra responsibility at work at the same time, I have a father who is sick and can no longer drive so my sister and I have stepped up and are doing everything we can for him, I feel like I have lost most of my friends as I am so detached, I will not speak to anyone who is a mutual friend of both me and my ex husband out of respect for him, I do not want anyone to feel like there in the middle so I have stepped back big time. I have minimul support one of my children has ADHD and is very angry atm, I feel like he is blaming me for our separation I feel so detached, so lost, so lonely, I miss my ex husband a lot but I know he doesn't feel the same, I am having a hard time trying to let go, I feel completely deflated, I feel like I do everything wrong and question everything I do and say, I feel like I have gotten to the point where I just am starting to give up because I just can't seem to fix myself, or my kids, I have never felt so alone

Leigh1987 Depressed because I don't like sex
  • replies: 9

Hello all, I have been suffering depression for years largely because I don't enjoy sex This means I will be a lifetime single which isn't the be all and end all but it still feels awful. Sex seems so fundamental to human happiness can I find a way t... View more

Hello all, I have been suffering depression for years largely because I don't enjoy sex This means I will be a lifetime single which isn't the be all and end all but it still feels awful. Sex seems so fundamental to human happiness can I find a way to be fulfilled without it?

Ely_ Dissociation and emotionless void
  • replies: 4

Any tips on how to stop dissociating? Last week my mum ignored me when I tried to help her understand my bpd more and then changed the topic. I got really angry and ever since I've been in an almost constant state of dissociation. I know that I need ... View more

Any tips on how to stop dissociating? Last week my mum ignored me when I tried to help her understand my bpd more and then changed the topic. I got really angry and ever since I've been in an almost constant state of dissociation. I know that I need to feel my feelings, I need to feel real and be 'in touch' with myself and my surroundings, including people. But just now it scares me and feels safer to block everything. I have tried grounding, meditation, distraction (makes it worse). My counsellor suggested watching emotional/funny videos. I tried earlier and nothing... Wtf is wrong with me.... I also just found out I have a sensory processing disorder, so that is messing with me a bit too.Tia xx Being like this is really bad for me, as I just bottle it all up and then explode at a later date. I can feel it roiling around waiting to ignite but I can't seem to let myself actually feel. It's like the walls are too strong. C-PTSD/BPD/Anxiety/Depression/Sensory issues are kicking my butt right now. It's like I'm being smacked down smaller and smaller and once I'm squashed small enough I'll just splat everywhere. Or like I'm one of those watermelons that people put all the elastic bands around..... Nothing...nothing..nothing...nothing...nothing.........................BOOM. Ely

Armagedeon Armagedeon
  • replies: 2

I have BPD and have just been very down for 2 and a half weeks. In that time I have self harmed. I was obsessed with my appearance during that time. Every time I looked in the mirror I wanted to self harm. I am now not self harming and am feeling rea... View more

I have BPD and have just been very down for 2 and a half weeks. In that time I have self harmed. I was obsessed with my appearance during that time. Every time I looked in the mirror I wanted to self harm. I am now not self harming and am feeling reasonably ok. However I watch Netflix where all people are beautiful and it starts me obsessing about my appearance again. My conversation is also mainly focused on that and it is naturally really annoying my friend. Any suggestions from anyone? Just as a final note I consider myself one of the ugliest people on the planet. I am doing things to distract myself, but the later is always in the back of my mind. If anyone is feeling like this now or has felt like this in the past please let me know and help me out somehow.

Depressed_mumma Lockdown extension announcement today
  • replies: 8

Hi. I’m new here. I spent almost 2 weeks in hospital for my depression in August and I came out desperately looking forward to the lockdown restrictions easing. I’m trying to work, homeschool my autistic prep child, look after my 3 yr old who can’t a... View more

Hi. I’m new here. I spent almost 2 weeks in hospital for my depression in August and I came out desperately looking forward to the lockdown restrictions easing. I’m trying to work, homeschool my autistic prep child, look after my 3 yr old who can’t attend childcare because my partner and I aren’t permitted workers. I have felt through all of this that I am doing a bad job at everything. I’m doing a bad job at work, I’m struggling to stay motivated in educating my child (and I’m a former teacher so this devastates me!), I’m grumpy with my three yr old even though she’s beautiful. I have no time left to love my partner properly even though he has been amazing in supporting me to get the help I need. I haven’t felt suicidal for a week or more (yay meds!) but today I’m struggling. I miss my friends, my family, my hobbies, my energy and myself. It would be nice to connect with others who found today disappointing, despite this lovely weather. I know things will get better but it seems so far away.

archimedes New and starting afresh
  • replies: 1

Hi , Im a 50 yr old man with three great children, I have a long history of anxiety and depression and generally not doing well at life. My wife has decided she wants a separation but until we sell the house we cannot live separately. Since the initi... View more

Hi , Im a 50 yr old man with three great children, I have a long history of anxiety and depression and generally not doing well at life. My wife has decided she wants a separation but until we sell the house we cannot live separately. Since the initial separation 6 months ago covid19 has affected my employer and i was made redundant, we are still gaining final approval for building a workshop on our property before we can put the house on the market. My mother revealed she was aware of the sexual abuse of my older sibling who perpetrated against myself when I was 10. Ive been reemployed because of the Jobkeeper financial support thankfully . I am experiencing elevated levels of stress and anxiety that i have never experienced before and only just coping with my crisis. I have sought help through psychologists and psychiatrists and taking medication to manage my situation. I have no other support network. I look back on a life of waste and squandered opportunity and find little or no solace in anything . The problems in my marriage were not totally my fault but most of the responsibility falls at my feet. I have never felt so isolated and alone with no hope in all of my life. I feel i have nothing left except my three children.

user981 Girl pushing me away
  • replies: 4

I was having a long distance relationship and 3 months in she started being different and ended up blocking me out of the blue for no reason. She told me later that she has had depression for several months and she got scared I might play her like al... View more

I was having a long distance relationship and 3 months in she started being different and ended up blocking me out of the blue for no reason. She told me later that she has had depression for several months and she got scared I might play her like all the other guys do. Since then she has just been different. There are times where she would push me away and not want to talk and tells me "don't talk to me" as if she is being a little aggressive/ upset. Sometimes she lies about things and the last month she has been lying about having a boyfriend. Recently she seemed more comfortable talking to me and opening up a little more so I decided to question her about this boyfriend she mentions occasionally. I knew it might not go well to tell her that the person doesn't exist. I don't know if she actually believes her own lie or not but she wouldn't admit anything instead she was saying goodnight trying to leave the conversation. Since that conversation she has been very different and has not wanted to talk to me and has been telling me that she needs some space and that she doesn't need anymore pressure on her. She used to be so close to me and seemed really happy to talk to me. She tells me now that she is not comfortable talking to me and to leave her alone. Is there something I can say to her to make her feel comfortable again? I guess for questioning her lies she pushes me away... I just want to be able to talk to her again.