Hi there,
As the title says, I am 45 (about to turn 46) and haven't been in a relationship for my entire life.
I have a great job, all the possessions I could ever want, lots of money in the bank, but I can't find someone to share my life with me.
I know lots of single women but I always get friend-zoned. I used to go out every weekend with my friends (who have been in relationships for a long time now), they always had luck with women, I never did. I asked a friend to be honest with me about my looks and she said I'm a 4/10, and I believe she was actually being nice and trying to boost my feelings, she's a good person.
I have tried lots of dating sites, both paid and unpaid and the only women who are interested in me I'm not physically attracted to, usually much older, call me shallow if you want but for a man to function properly you need to be physically attracted to your partner. Don't get me wrong, I'd rather date an average-looking or below average-looking woman with a nice personality than a supermodel who had bad character traits.
I've talked to my friends about this and all they say is go and see a psychologist or get some anti-depressants, which are things I've done many times before. When I have had anti-depressants they have taken me from being extremely depressed to laying in a hospital bed due to suicide attempts, and I find cognitive behavioural therapy and trying to make coping strategies useless and extremely frustrating.
I don't have any family so I sit at home alone all the time, I feel anxiety going to a bar on my own to meet people, my "friends" rarely invite me to social events, and I've given up trying to celebrate birthdays years ago due to only two of my core friends bothering to show up.
I feel as though I tried and tried to get on top of my depression but it just gets worse. All I want is not to be lonely anymore.
Whenever I do seek help from friends they just tell me to do what hasn't worked many times before, and when I seek professional help they want me to try more pills and more therapy.
I'm not a genius but I'm not dim either, I can solve most issues that I come across in life and usually am able to help others with their problems also, but I've been trying to find a solution to my problems my entire adult life.
I'm hoping someone might be able to give me some advice, but even if this is too hard (and I completely understand that) it's been nice to get this off my chest just typing this out.
