What am I doing wrong?

[Xanderman96]

Hi, I’m 22 and I fell like shit and feel lonely 80% of the time. I act like I’m in the greatest mood round my family and work colleagues but I am not.

All I do is sit around doing FA such as eating, playing PlayStation and the only times I go out is for work or to go to the movies and that’s it. I lie to my parents about having friends when I have none.

I NEED another person who I can share my thoughts with and also give my heart to someone (girlfriend) and for her to give me her love but no I’m a fat person who does nothing who eats constantly and obviously no one likes (other than my family obviously)

ive told two girls and work that I have feelings for them, one called me an idiot and the other who I fell in love with and wished she would said yes told me no. Maybe I’m just one of those people that people talk to and become acquaintances not friends. Like I message them and say hey did you wanna do something but they are always busy or to be quite frank don’t want to do anything with me. I have photosensitive epilepsy so I can’t go to clubs or pubs too meet new people or hanging out with colleagues.

as I said, I need that someone to love and for them to love me back but no one will and sorry but that SUCKS

i was hoping to come on here for some help, I’m not suicidal or anything but I’m getting to the point of breakdown, what should I do?

[baet123]

Hey Xander,

Welcome to BB and thanks for sharing your situation with us. It takes extreme bravery, courage and strength to post on forums and provide people with an insight to how your truly feeling and you should be extremely proud. You possess amazing qualities and my hats off to you!

Sorry to hear that you are feeling this way. I too for years put on a huge facade and was extremely lonely and unhappy. I suffered from severe depression and anxiety from the age of 17-24 so I can relate to much of what your going through. It does suck but it will get better and that pain your feeling now is temporary.

Why do you mention nobody likes you? You seem really cool and you would be a great friend too have. May I ask what PlayStation games you play? I am a big gamer myself!

In terms of finding a partner, have you tried any apps or tried joining social groups that share similar interests as you? Sites/apps like meetup and we3apps are a great place to meet like minded people and you are able to build relationships and your social network with people who share common interests with you. Please do not get disheartened. There are many fish in the sea and you will find the right partner. You have many, many great qualities and you are quite the catch. Don't get disheartened every time someone you are attracted too or have feelings for doesn't feel the same way about you. This has happened many times to me but that is just how the cookie crumbles.

I would consider seeing your GP and talking to him about your concerns and feelings and establishing a plan of attack. I believe medication may be applicable to your situation and a combination of medication and therapy would be extremely beneficial but that is something you should discuss with your GP. A psychologist will also provide you with therapy techniques to improve your thinking, emotional well-being and quality of life.

I know that things may seem bleak at present but things to get better man. They did for me and I was in such a deep dark place so I am very optimistic that they will for your. Our struggles in life make us that much stronger and when you do come out of this trough you find yourself in, you will appreciate the good days that much more.

Look forward to learning more about you and I await your reply.

Your friend,

Nick.