What a last year

[Bull]

Hi first time for me

i come fro a very violent childhood where I watched my dad bash my mum repeatedly 

we were always rescued by our grandparents 

finally mum met another man which was good for her but he lashed out on me

Last year 

September….

ive split up my wife after 29 years & going through divorce & settlement of property etc

our sons 27&26 but still are upset

January….

my 14 year old dog died

febuary….

i met a lady 

march…

a close friend of hers died

may….

my mum died

august…

this lady who I fell in love with has told me to go away 

[smallwolf]

Hello and welcome.

It sounds as though you have been through an incredibly difficult time...for everything you've had to endure - firstly, growing up in a violent environment and watching your mum suffer, and then facing your own personal losses must have been so painful.

With everything that has happened it's would be okay to feel broken or lost right now. It seend you have not been able to catch a break!

Please be kind to yourself during this time.

I wonder who you might have to reach out to for support? Perhaps friends? Or even professional help to find some relief and word out a way forward?

[tranzcrybe]

The often unseen side of grief and trauma is they way we perceive the world more negatively while trying to adjust to change and personal upheaval.
What seemed right can turn around in an instant and feel out of place/foreign, even painful; and issues we once took in our stride can suddenly bowl us over with ease.
Your sons are processing this also, as would be your lady friend in dealing with her own loss - even your ex wife may be experiencing heartache and poor decisions that could not be reconciled.
Despite all this pain, a preparedness to communicate openly with all those affected can help heal the hurt and develop an acceptance that, while we are impacted by such things, we are not solely responsible for them.

It is an important phase to finding your way forward.