Unsure what is going on

[Mistletoe]

Hi,

I’m new here.

I’ve recently started taking a new medication for ADHD after a recent diagnosis.

I thought the medication was supposed to increase dopamine but I have been highly emotional ever since I started and don’t understand why.

I’m not sure if it is a coincidence or not, but I have been under a lot of stress this year (not Covid related) and my anxiety and mental health have taken a hit. But the last week has been really low.

Today I was a mess and I could not get suicidal thought out of my head. I was crying uncontrollably and my husband made mention of the fact he thought the new medication was going to make me happier and that my moods bring him down. I’m snappy at my kids and I just feel like an incredible burden on everyone.

my husband didn’t sign up to being with someone who is so emotional all the time. He wants someone who is happy and vibrant and laughing all the time despite his own bad moods.

im tired, unmotivated, lacking severe energy, eating terribly, can’t exercise because my body won’t allow me to at the moment due to injury so I’ve put on excess weight. I hate the sight of myself in the mirror and I feel like there is no way of pulling myself out of any of it.

😔

[Sophie_M]

Hi Mistletoe,

Welcome to the forums, and thank you for your bravery and openness in sharing here. It’s a really good place to have come to hear from others who understand what you’re going through. We can hear how difficult the past few months have been, we’re so sorry that’s been going on.

It sounds like you’ve taken some really good steps in seeing the GP, receiving a diagnosis and beginning some new medication. We'd strongly recommend you update the GP on how you’re going, especially since you’ve been having thoughts about suicide.

We’d also really recommend calling the Beyond Blue Support Line on 1300 22 4636. The counsellors there are super kind and supportive, they’re understanding and can be good to talk to right in the midst of these feelings, or at any moment so that you can work out your next steps in getting more support together with them on the phone. You can also reach them via Online Chat here (11am-midnight AEDT).

It’s really important that you are kind to yourself, and keep yourself safe. Please remember that if you feel unsafe the number to call is 000. It also sounds like the Beyond Now suicide safety planning app may be a helpful resource to you. You can read about how it works and where to download it here: https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/beyondnow-suicide-safety-planning . You can even call Lifeline on 13 11 14 and compete it together with one of their counsellors over the phone

We hope that you find our forums to be a safe and supportive space to talk through your thoughts and feelings. Our community is here for you, and we’re sure they’ll spot your post soon enough and have some kind words and understanding for you.

Kind regards,

Sophie M

[Petal22]

Hi Mistletoe,

Wellcome to our forums!

Im sorry you are feeling this way.

How would you feel about going back to your gp and discussing how you are currently feeling? You could talk to your gp about the type of thoughts you are having.

I learned that suicidal thoughts sometimes accompany anxiety and depression.

Im sorry your husband is reacting to you in the way he is……. Is he showing you some support?

We all go up and down in life and that’s ok, I believe it’s part of the journey.

Hang in there your not alone.